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Quote by Robert Benchley

“My only solution for the problem of habitual accidents is to stay in bed all day. Even then, there is always the chance that you will fall out.”

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Robert Benchley

Robert Benchley was an American humorist, writer, and actor, known for his witty humor style and unique satirical techniques. His career spanned theater, film, and radio, and he achieved significant success in the early 20th century. more

“If you are one of the hewers of wood and drawers of small weekly paychecks, your letters will have to contain some few items of news or they will be accounted dry stuff.... But if you happen to be of a literary turn of mind, or are, in any way, likely to become famous, you may settle down to an afternoon of letter-writing on nothing more sprightly in the way of news than the shifting of the wind from south to south-east.”

Ifs Way Writing Mind May Happens Turns Stuff Wind Fame News Letters South Woods East Settling Dry Afternoon Items Shifting Drawers Paychecks Settling Down Letter Writing

Author:Robert Benchley

“If you watch animals objectively for any length of time, you're driven to the conclusion that their main aim in life is to pass on their genes to the next generation.”

Ifs Life Is Next Animal Watches Generations Aim Driven Conclusion Length Genes Next Generation

Author:David Attenborough

“A woman who is willing to be herself and pursue her own potential runs not so much the risk of loneliness, as the challenge of exposure to more interesting men - and people in general.”

People Men Running Challenges Interesting Risk Loneliness Willing Pursue Exposure Being Alone Interesting Man

Author:Lorraine Hansberry

“If Shakespeare were alive today and writing comedy for the movies, he would be the head-liner for the Mack Sennett studios.”

Ifs Writing Would Be Today Comedy Alive Studios Live For Today Mack Writing Comedy

Book:Benchley beside himself

Source: Benchley beside himself

“Most personal correspondence of today consists of letters the first half of which are given over to an indexed statement of why the writer hasn't written before, followed by one paragraph of small talk, with the remainder devoted to reasons why it is imperative that the letter be brought to a close.”

Firsts Reason Today Given Half Written Letters Statements Reason Why Devoted Imperatives Paragraph Correspondence Small Talk

Book:Benchley beside himself

Source: Benchley beside himself

“I have often wondered how they manage to get return envelopes which miss, by one-quarter of an inch, fitting the blank you are supposed to return. They say, "Please fill out and return the enclosed envelope," and the enclosed envelope is always one-quarter of an inch too small.”

Missing Return Please Manage Quarters Inches Blank Fitting Envelopes

Author:Robert Benchley

“There is probably not more than one hundred dollars in cash in circulation today. That is, if you were to call in all the bills and silver and gold in the country at noon tomorrow and pile them on the table, you would find that you had just about one hundred dollars, with perhaps several Canadian pennies and a few peppermint Life Savers.”

Ifs Country Today Money Tomorrow Hundred Gold Tables Bills Dollars Finance Silver Cash Pennies Noon Circulation Peppermint

Book:Love Conquers All

Source: Love Conquers All

“One of the great natural phenomena is the way in which a tube of toothpaste suddenly empties itself when it hears that you are planning a trip, so that when you come to pack it is just a twisted shell of its former self, with not even a cubic millimeter left to be squeezed out.”

Way Self Left Natural Travel Planning Former Shells Packs Twisted Tubes Toothpaste Natural Phenomena

Book:20,000 Leagues Under the Sea: Or, David Cooperfield

Source: 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea: Or, David Cooperfield

Quote by Robert Benchley

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