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Quote by Arkady Martine

“She'd meant, 'When you understand that when the Empire commands, I can't say no.' She'd meant, 'When you understand that there's no room for me to mean yes, even if I want to.' She'd meant, 'You don't understand that there's no such thing as being free.' Free to choose, or free otherwise.”

Quote by Arkady Martine

Work

A Desolation Called Peace

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Arkady Martine

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“I know for a fact that no matter where I go, the memory and the suffering of not being with you will cripple me. I will go to work, fire up my PC, only to check if you're online. I will hover the pointer to your name, it will pop your contact details--just the contact details, no photo, no one-liners, no sign of what we used to have--but I shall linger and stare at it for hours. I will attempt to start a chat, but will close it without even a word to type. I will try to divert my thoughts back to work. But will fail. I will always go back to you. One hour to another, it's 5 PM. I pack my things, unproductive for the day and smile. I'm doing that again tomorrow and the next.”

“I am very bothered when I think of the bad things I have done in my life. Not least that time in the chemistry lab when I held a pair of scissors by the blades and played the handles in the naked lilac flame of the Bunsen burner; then called your name, and handed them over. O the unrivalled stench of branded skin as you slipped your thumb and middle finger in, then couldn’t shake off the two burning rings. Marked, the doctor said, for eternity. Don’t believe me, please, if I say that was just my butterfingered way, at thirteen, of asking you if you would marry me." — I Am Very Bothered”