“Compulsive slot machine playing, i.e., sitting on that ugly stool, pushing that stupid button for eight hours without a break, does the same thing as mindfulness! Mindfulness asks us to be acutely aware of our current surroundings, of the sights and sounds right in front of us. I can think of no activity, including mindful meditation, that has us slot machine addicts focused so intently on the sights and sounds in the present moment as when we compulsively play a slot machine. And while most people can meditate for several minutes (some even up to an hour or more), us slot machine addicts can push that button for many hours without a break, all the while very mindfully aware of the present sights and sounds. This is why the treatment professionals call slot machine addiction "escape gambling". This is why those evil machines have such a hold on us. When we sit down on that stool pushing that button, we know we will enter another world, a world outside of our day-to-day existence, outside of that day-to-day world that is too often full of confusing and painful thoughts. In the slot machine world, our focus becomes completely involved with the machine - the visuals, the sounds, the anticipation of a win. There is no room what-so-ever for any other thought to intrude into our consciousness. We are totally in the present (for however long it takes to lose all our money). Mindfulness by machine addiction.”
Source: Gambling Addiction: The complete guide to survival, treatment, and recovery from gambling addiction.
“If you can eliminate the need for escaping from your negative thoughts, you can eliminate the need to gamble. Make that your quest.”
Source: Gambling Addiction: The complete guide to survival, treatment, and recovery from gambling addiction.
“Addicted gamblers carry a substantial burden of shame and guilt. Unlike most other addictions and disorders, gambling most often is done in secret; and in order to keep their addiction secret, gamblers will lie, deceive, and steal. Not only are they ashamed about gambling, and losing money, they are even more shamefully about all the lies and deceptions that they constantly need to employ with their family and friends.”
Source: Gambling Addiction: The complete guide to survival, treatment, and recovery from gambling addiction.
“Unlike most other addictions and disorders, gambling most often is done in secret.”
Source: Gambling Addiction: The complete guide to survival, treatment, and recovery from gambling addiction.
“I would assert, and I know this personally from years of living with it, that the shame of not being able to quit, of being too weak to stop, of being unable to do the right thing, unable to do the thing that everyone else that I know could easily do - that weakness, that level of shame changes your life. You can deal with the financial losses, and you can even deal with the lies (they have a short half-life, either you get away with it, or you apologize and say you won't do it again). But the shame, guilt, and loss of respect for yourself when you can't make yourself stop, that awful sinkhole of personal failure, never goes away.”
Source: Gambling Addiction: The complete guide to survival, treatment, and recovery from gambling addiction.
“At some point in the recovery process, the addicted gambler will learn that they have an addiction, that their brain has been compromised by their gambling behavior, and that it is now preventing them from stopping that behavior. That knowledge will help a little to reduce the shame. The problem that still exists is that your friends and family likely don't know you have an addiction, or they don't really understand what that means. You know that they are judging you, you still feel the helplessness of that judgment, and yet you still don't really understand why you can't stop. It gets even worse. In order to justify your new reality that you can't quit, that you have an addiction, the thing that will irrefutably prove your inability to quit, and that will show to others that you do, in fact, have an addiction, is to continue to gamble. You can then say with confidence to your therapist or family, I have an addiction! I went to the casino again, I can't stop. Because if I do simply stop, I wouldn't have this inability to stop. My addiction excuse would disappear, and I would have to go back to knowing that I'm stupid and weak and immoral for all the gambling I have done. So, in order to not feel weak, stupid and immoral, I'll run with that addiction idea and just keep on gambling! This is where Dr. Linehan's concept of Radical Acceptance can be very powerful for addicted gamblers. It is a way out of the negative spiral described in the previous paragraphs. Don't get stuck in the guilt and shame cycle. Accept that those things are in your past, cannot be changed, and need to be understood simply as what you've done, not who you are. Then you can move on to finding solutions for your goal of changing future behavior, for your goal of living a gambling free life.”
Source: Gambling Addiction: The complete guide to survival, treatment, and recovery from gambling addiction.
“Do not confuse acceptance (or forgiveness) with "acceptable". What we have done - the gambling, lies, deceptions, etc. - is not acceptable. Radical acceptance simply means that yes, you did all those things. You gambled and lied and deceived - all of that happened, and you now accept your prior behavior as fact. Beyond acceptance comes forgiveness.”
Source: Gambling Addiction: The complete guide to survival, treatment, and recovery from gambling addiction.
“Most of us are compassionate people. We are often compassionate to others, but seldom with ourselves. Do you think it might be time, as you work toward your recovery, to forgive yourself? What would that mean to you? Could that possibly free you up and give you strength to focus on your future in a more positive fashion?”
Source: Gambling Addiction: The complete guide to survival, treatment, and recovery from gambling addiction.
“We can never know what to want, because, living only one life, we can neither compare it with our previous lives nor perfect it in our lives to come.
Was it better to be with Tereza or to remain alone?
There is no means of testing which decision is better, because there is no basis for comparison. We live everything as it comes, without warning, like an actor going on cold. And what can life be worth if the first rehearsal for life is life itself? That is why life is always like a sketch.”
Source: The Unbearable Lightness of Being
“In the 12-step program, the reason you are successful in recovery is because you stopped trying to impose your willpower on your addiction and have instead turned your recovery over to a higher power. But if our personal willpower is unable to conquer our addiction, then how do you explain all the people who are in long-term recovery who don’t believe in a higher power? How did they recover? Fortunately, there are many paths to dealing with addiction that don’t involve a higher power.”
Source: Gambling Addiction: The complete guide to survival, treatment, and recovery from gambling addiction.