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Christmas in Kent: A Pride and Prejudice Variation

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Meg Osborne

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“After another ten minutes of driving through lush forestland, we emerge into sunlight and I'm convinced we drove out of London and into Jane Austen's imagination. A massive golden-brick mansion sneers at us with stately disregard. White pillars decorate the exterior, and a series of fountains line an expansive, perfectly manicured green lawn. I half expect to see Mr. Darcy emerge from one of the ponds. "It is a truth universally acknowledged," I whisper, "that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a demon." Doug snickers next to me. He's remained carefully limp in case there are more cameras. "Oh my gods. What if - what if it actually is Colin Firth? If Colin Firth wants to hunt you, I might let him. Well, I'd let early- to midnineties Colin Firth hunt you. I'll have to see how he looks in person now." "I can support that.”

“I should like balls infinitely better,' she replied, 'if they were carried on in a different manner; but there is something insufferably tedious in the usual process of such a meeting. It would surely be much more rational if conversation instead of dancing were made the order of they day.' 'Much more rational, my dear Caroline, I dare say, but it would not be near so much like a ball.”