Home / Quotes / Quote by Nikesh Shukla

Quote by Nikesh Shukla

“We'd taken up our positions on the benches between the school hall and a newly-installed outdoor basketball court. Being hip-hoppers, we were obliged to be obsessed with basketball. None of us had a ball.”

Book:Coconut Unlimited

Work

Coconut Unlimited

Browse quotes and source details for this work. more

Author

Nikesh Shukla

Browse famous quotes and profile details for Nikesh Shukla. more

“Ah, but surely you must now be saying, "waitaminute, tuna fish would go bad if you kept it in your pocket for weeks and weeks without refrigerating it." To that I simply say: You obviously haven't read Professor P.S. Schackman's informative book How to Keep Tuna Fish in Your Pocket for Weeks and Weeks Without it Going Bad. I suggest you read it before complaining about the tuna situation again.”

Humour

Book:The Facttracker

Source: The Facttracker

“Colonel Cathcart is our commanding officer and we must obey him. Why don't you fly four more missions and see what happens?" "I don't want to." "Suppose we let you pick your missions and fly milk runs?" Major Major said. "That way you can fly the four missions and not run any risks." "I don't want to fly milk runs. I don't want to be in the war anymore." "Would you like to see our country lose?" Major Major asked. "We won't lose. We've got more men, more money, and more material. There are ten million men in uniform who could replace me. Some people are getting killed and a lot more are making money and having fun. Let somebody else get killed." "But suppose everybody on our side felt that way?" "Then I'd certainly be a damned fool to feel any other way. Wouldn't I?”

Humour

Book:Catch-22

Source: Catch-22

“…a waitress came out and plonked in front of each of us a small standard terra-cotta flowerpot in which had been baked a little loaf of bread. "What's this?" I asked. "It's bread," she replied. "But it's in a flowerpot?" She gave me a look that I was beginning to think of as the Darwin stare. It was a look that said, "Yeah? So?" "Well, isn't that kind of unusual?" She considered for a moment. "Is a bit, I suppose." "And will we be following a horticultural theme throughout the meal?" Her expression contorted in a deeply pained look, as if she were trying to suck her face into the back of her head. "What?" "Will the main course arrive in a wheelbarrow?" I elaborated helpfully. "Will you be serving the salad with a pitchfork?" "Oh, no. It's just the bread that's special." "I'm so pleased to hear it.”

Humour

Book:In a Sunburned Country

Source: In a Sunburned Country

“She’d never been any kind of camper, never had been good at relieving a full bladder on a whim. Never had quite figured out that squat; it seemed like she’d always wet her right foot.”

Humour

Book:A Virgin River Christmas

Source: A Virgin River Christmas

“Un optimiste, c'est un homme qui plante deux glands et qui s'achète un hamac.”

Humour French Glands Homme Optimiste Tassigny Hamac

Author:Jean de Lattre de Tassigny

“I want the evening upon which we lose our collective virginities to be special. I'm no parthenologist but I suspect that Jordana's virginity is still intact. Her biological knowledge is minimal. She thinks that a perineum is to do with glacial moraine.”

Sex Humour Virginity

Book:Submarine

Source: Submarine

“Words were insufficient for the elevation of his [Mr Collins'] feelings; and he was obliged to walk about the room, while Elizabeth tried to unite civility and truth in a few short sentences.”

Truth Humour Civility

Book:Pride and Prejudice

Source: Pride and Prejudice

“Writing is like a lump of coal. Put it under enough pressure and polish it enough and you might just end up with a diamond. Otherwise, you can burn it to keep warm.”

Inspirational Humour Writing Advice

Author:A.J. Dalton

“Monsters don’t get happy endings.”

Happiness Monsters

Book:Ferocious

Source: Ferocious

Quote by Nikesh Shukla

Work

Author

You May Also Like