“It took more than motherhood to move me toward meditation. I first had to lose things—my mother, my marriage, my cynicism. I had to make life-changing decisions. Yet I moved, step by step, into the unknown inner world. Hesitatingly. Skeptically. Slowly.”
Source: Rewriting My Happily Ever After: A Memoir of Divorce and Discovery
“Another socially important variable associated with mental ability is that of marriage, or more specifically that of who marries whom. A consistent finding in several studies of the characteristics of spouses is that there is a tendency for spouses to be similar in some—but not all—aspects of mental ability; in other words, some aspects of mental ability do show substantial “assortative mating.”
For example, in a study of married couples, Watson et al. (2004) examined spouses' scores on two mental ability tasks—a vocabulary test and a matrix reasoning test. Interestingly, even though vocabulary and matrix reasoning tend to be correlated with each other (both are strongly g-loaded tests), they revealed quite different results when correlations between spouses were considered. On the one hand, wives' and husbands' levels of vocabulary showed a fairly strong positive correlation, about .45.
But, on the other hand, wives' and husbands' levels of matrix reasoning were correlated only about .10. This result is consistent with previous findings, in which spouses have tended to show quite similar levels of verbal comprehension ability, but no particular similarity in mathematical reasoning ability (e.g., Botwin, Buss, & Shackelford, 1997).
Why should it be the case that spouses tend to be similar in verbal abilities, but not so similar in (equally g-loaded) nonverbal reasoning abilities? One likely explanation—as you might guess—is that two people will tend to have more rewarding conversations if they have similar levels of verbal ability, but that similar levels of nonverbal or mathematical reasoning ability are unlikely to contribute in an important way to any aspect of relationship quality.”
Source: Individual Differences and Personality
“Etiquette tip: If you're looking for the right time to leave a party, when the host yells, "No one leaves here alive," that's your cue.”
Source: The Hammer of Thor
“They said love is fleeting, so we hung on to it through thick and thin.
They said marriage is about compromise, so we made it about equality.
They said jobs exist just to pay bills, so we made up one we enjoyed.
They said you need to settle for a mediocre life, so we made it about chasing the extraordinary.”
Source: Bruised Passports: Travelling the World as Digital Nomads
“Before getting married, one should be required to see the world and its beauty. Fall in love with at least three people. Taste good with people you never knew existed. If your world is limited, you’ve settled.”
“We had both accepted the unwritten rule of arranged marriage: love, if it arrived at all, would bloom with time.”
Source: Rewriting My Happily Ever After: A Memoir of Divorce and Discovery
“Was the purpose of marriage procreation and the objective of a child’s life to hold on to each parent and keep them together through a combination of guilt, love, duty, and fear?”
Source: Rewriting My Happily Ever After: A Memoir of Divorce and Discovery
“Shouldn’t there be more to a marriage? A clarity of purpose? A unity of vision? Team spirit? Common goals? A mutual love of things and each other?”
Source: Rewriting My Happily Ever After: A Memoir of Divorce and Discovery
“Arranged marriages were like this. You move from your father’s home to your husband's house, trusting that the system has your back. Like the net that trapeze artists don’t see but know will catch them if they fall, the tradition and the community that endorses this practice is supposed to be the invisible net that supports every couple embarking on such a marriage purely based on their faith in their family’s good intentions.”
Source: Rewriting My Happily Ever After: A Memoir of Divorce and Discovery
“I wept for the loss of my innocence, for the erosion of my faith in marriage, for the uncertainty of a future that depended solely on me.”
Source: Rewriting My Happily Ever After: A Memoir of Divorce and Discovery