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Quote by Kilroy J. Oldster

“Dangerous falsehoods prevent a person from maturing into his or her essential self. Recognizing personal fictions is the first step in self-healing and personal transcendence. Americans tend to focus on obtaining exterior symbols of success rather than working to awaken their consciousness. Valuing people by their usefulness and richness discounts the innate dignity of humankind. The quality of a person’s consciousness determines his or her capability to experience bliss. Ego gratification represents the darkest part of human nature.”

Quote by Kilroy J. Oldster

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Dead Toad Scrolls

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Kilroy J. Oldster

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“Select people find themselves early on in life, while other people undergo painful stages of vast changes. Some people never exhibit a centralizing persona and they tend to undergo a series of crisis throughout their lives. I observed some friends, family members, and other acquaintances at various stages in their lives and they seem virtually the same person years later. I am a person who cyclically turns himself inside out after crashing and burning, failing, and then reassembling the seeds of defeat into new victories, only to run aground again. I mentally and emotionally resist change and must consciously force a personal metamorphosis. Could I radically change again? Did I possess the internal reserves to weather a period of reconstitution and then make myself over into a new prototype? Can I will myself to becoming the person I aspire to be? Can I take advantage of human consciousness to broker a way out of self-defeat and a misery-ridden life?”

“Free will and the choices that we make every day provides for self-identification. We all hold the plenary powers of discretion to script who and what we are. Self-determination comes from refusal to passively accept whatever doctrine is convenient and move beyond glib answers and popular canons to staunch the torrent of life’s abuses. Intensely pushing forward into troubled waters the clear becomes murky, the certain become problematic, and the real become ethereal. Striping our consciousness of all familiar handholds can lead to dissolution of the sense of a transient self. Disintegration of a preconceived notion of self-identity can lead to either psychosis or a degree of self-mastery, depending upon an individual’s ability to absorb and integrate the secret reserves of their psyche power. Self-awareness comes at a high price but it has distinct rewards. Shrewdly shredded of all falsities we can see what is apparent. Brusquely scouring our brain of layers of toxic emotional sludge reveals a sterling center point. Starting anew we can launch ourselves in a more charming and cheerful image that is both natural and necessary to build upon in order to achieve and sustain our robust constitutional fortitude.”

“The logical thinking ability of the conscious mind evolves as we mature. The clutter of capricious milieu relegated to the capacious matrix of the unconscious mind expands as we encounter variegated mileposts in life. Scrambled drives and conflicting motives influence formation of the conscious and unconscious self. Some of my previous apex personal motives and accomplishments are now repugnant to me. I seek to realign motives, drives, and desires of the conscious and unconscious mind into an orderly system in order to reduce anxiety and to reach self-fulfillment.”

“I am an autonomous human being, self-regulating and self-governing, and duty bound to quest for the pure idea of how I wish to exist. I need to make the most of this breath of life while I can. I wish to live mindfully. I seek a roadmap leading to personal enlightenment, a means to live as effortlessly as a cork bobbing on a river, not resisting the flow of the stream, not fighting myself, liberated from the anxiety of foolishly lingering over prior travels, unconcerned where I am at, and accepting without reservation where I am heading without desiring more. A person with a light heart and a sound mind wants for nothing. I seek to travel into the mist of future while conscientiously working towards obtaining spiritual enlightenment. I search to acquire an active and open state of mindfulness, but I must exercise caution in doing so, because any degree of wanting, any foray to acquire money or acclaim, undermines the desire to achieve mental stillness and emotional equanimity. By living in an authentic and spontaneous manner, without striving, without obsessing about the horror of the past and the ambiguity of looming future, and by living exclusively in the now, I hope to experience the universal truths – the ultimate reality of absolute existence – reflective of the true nature of the universe.”