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Quote by Rajesh`

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Rajesh`

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“He had known on some level, even if he couldn't articulate it clearly at the time, that the problem, the thing that kept him from being loved, was his tendency toward excess, the big hunger inside of him, the same force that had made him drink and drug that had mutated in sobriety to other things - mostly food and validation- and he stuffed the emptiness however he could. His need was bottomless.”

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Book:Broken People
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“If you are avoidant, the first step, therefore, is to acknowledge your need for space—whether emotional or physical—when things get too close, and then learn how to communicate that need. Explain to your partner in advance that you need some time alone when you feel things getting too mushy and that it’s not a problem with him or her but rather your own need in any relationship (this bit is important!). This should quell their worries and somewhat calm their attachment system. They are then less likely to intensify their efforts to draw closer to you.”

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Book:Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love
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“Whether you attack or yield, you are reacting. You are off track, no longer focused on the prize—the protection of your core interests and needs. Yielding rewards the other’s abusive behavior, and counterattacking reinforces it. In either case, you interrupt the other’s process of accepting our No. The choice is yours. The moment you react to the other’s reaction, you are initiating an action-reaction cycle that can go on forever. The alternative is not to react but rather to stay true to your underlying Yes. Keep your focus on what matters to you.”

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Book:The Power of a Positive No: How to Say No and Still Get to Yes
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“I told him I would go up there; he said no, no, everything was fine. I drove up anyway and when I opened the door to the house he was sitting alone in the kitchen, the kettle on the stove madly whistling away. He was fast asleep; after the stroke he sometimes nodded off in the middle of things. I woke him, and when he saw me he patted my cheek. 'Good boy,' he muttered. I made him change his clothes and then fixed us a dinner of fried rice from some leftovers.”

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Book:Native Speaker
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“What’s important is, who needs to move where? Does the incrementalist need to move closer to the completionist’s view or vice versa? In either case, you’ve got to use the simplest trick in the conflict resolution book : finding common ground. A better way to think about this is, “What do these disparate philosophies need from each other?”

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Book:Managing Humans: Biting and Humorous Tales of a Software Engineering Manager
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