“Look, at some point, people have to tell their kids that Santa Claus isn't real. I hate to be the guy to do it, but it's just not real.” PeopleLooksRealKidsGuyHateI HateSantaSanta Claus Author:Floyd Landis
“I am always amazed by the novel angles that people come up with for kids' Christmas books. Even if a family is not religious, who could resist, say, "Olive, the Other Reindeer," about Olive the dog who thinks the song refers to her and heads for the North Pole to help Santa out?” PeopleIfsThinkingBookHelpingKidsSongReligiousNovelDogCome UpAmazedAngleSantaOlivesNorth PoleReindeer Author:Jabari Asim
“They were on the set of Bad Santa, but I tried to keep the headphones away from them. My kids have seen Sling Blade, Armageddon, Bandits and Friday Night Lights. They have not seen Monster's Ball and nor will they ever. Even when they are 60. I will leave it in my will.” LightKidsNightLaughterBallsMonstersSixtyFridayBladesSantaArmageddonFriday NightHeadphonesBanditsNight LightFriday Night LightsBad Santa Author:Billy Bob Thornton
“Empathising with the younger children on whom the same confidence trick was being imposed, I embarked on a crusade around the neighbourhood, telling all the kids that there was no Santa Claus. This reached the ears of the father of a neighbouring family, who reproved me for spoiling it for the little ones. Spoiling it! I could not understand what he meant. To my mind, they were being made fools of, and I was only saving them from this indignity.” MindChildrenLittlesMadeKidsFatherAtheismFoolEarsPositive AtheismTricksSavingSantaSanta ClausCrusadesIndignityNeighbourhoods Author:Barbara Smoker
“My husband is so cheap. On Christmas Eve, he fires one shot and tells the kids Santa committed suicide.” KidsFireHusbandShotsSuicideCommittedMy HusbandSantaChristmas Eve Author:Phyllis Diller