“One of the clues that I chased was that Dan Cooper, whoever he was, found an old magazine story called "How to Leave Your Life." And followed the directions on how to leave your life, and just went to the beach one day with his wife and kids, and said he needed to go to the bathroom, and went to the restroom at the beach and never came home.” SaidStoriesHomeKidsFoundWifeNeededOne DayMagazinesBeachClueBathroomRestroom Author:Geoffrey Gray
“I knew a girl named Nikki I guess u could say she was a sex fiend I met her in a hotel lobby Masturbating with a magazine She said "how'd u like 2 waste some time?" And I could not resist when I saw little Nikki grind.” LittlesSaidGirlSexSawsMetsWasteMagazinesHotelGrindHotel Lobby Author:Prince
“My mom is very religious and she said, 'Whatever you think about all the time, that's what you worship.' If that's the case I'd like everyone to pop open their Diet Coke cans and turn to page 37 of their People Magazines. In this holy scripture, we read the parable of Ms. Valerie Bertinelli.” PeopleIfsThinkingSaidTurnsReligiousCasesMomHolyWorshipPagesMy MomPopsScriptureMagazinesDietsCokeParablesHoly ScripturesDiet Coke Author:Maria Bamford