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Elelwani Anita Ravhuhali Biography

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“Eternally place on hold the voice that justifies stories in your mind about inadequacy. Make love with the voice that attributes all the logic under the sun as to why you are adequate. Hold on to it, allow it to whisper sweetness in your ear. Abide with it, believe it. Discontinue ripping yourself to shreds. Quit admitting blasphemous utterances about yourself in your dwelling.”

“You can only get away with being guided by your restrictions for so long until the universe intervenes and seize everything you’re utilizing to shield yourself from evolving. When the time is up, the universe doesn’t propose room for negotiation, where your life’s decisions are informed by your fears. Often, when the universe steps in, it leaves you with nothing to persuade yourself to remain the same”

“Often, deceitful and unfaithful individuals seem to deny those they have claimed to love any form of clarity. You are left hanging, often having to fend for yourself on where the truth lies. It seems they operate under the assumption that those in their lives will eventually figure a way out, that they will somehow read other people’s minds and know where they stand.”

“What I don’t realize is that I am battling with pain. I have not yet found a way to navigate my way around it. It’s just there, living in my mind and heart. I don’t know what to do with pain, and I keep talking about it, hoping it leaves someday.”

“It may feel terrifying to experience the shame and fear of rejection, but it is also a liberating moment. It is a moment where you allow yourself to feel every inch of pain that you avoided by building these crumbling walls. It’s the pain we were supposed to feel and let go, finally leaving our bodies.”

“I combed through my body, my mind, searching for any residual remains of heartbreaking memories, making peace with them, and often forgiving myself for the role I played. I emptied myself of pain and welcomed new love. I painted it away, I walked it away, I hiked it away, I sang it away, I traveled it away, and I lived my life discovering every reason to pour love within myself. I did everything I could to unclog every inch of pain that may have been left in my body and in my mind.”

“The dance floor of love welcomes the unquestionable, It welcomes the prepared, It welcomes the deliberate. The dance floor of love expands the ground to tear apart suspicion. The dance floor of love expands the ground to demonstrate what the absence of doubt looks like. The dance floor of love, in all its segments, never makes an opening for nervousness, mistrust, inconsistency, and hesitation. Reject the invitation to a dance floor loaded with unpreparedness and anticipation. Love is forever specific, always ready, and never at the mercy of indecision.”

“The effort you put into repairing and contending in the relationships, turn that around into yourself and begin asking yourself: “why do I find it okay to be mistreated.?”. “Why am I so comfortable with being discarded like I don’t matter?” “Why do I find it okay to suffer for love?” These questions will lead you to a place that may frighten you.” Excerpt From: Elelwani Anita Ravhuhali. “From Seeking to Radiating Love”. Apple Books.”

“When I constantly beg someone to treat me right, love and respect me, I am projecting the kind of love I wish to receive and know I deserve, but I have somehow allowed my limitations to inform me that I need to crawl on my knees, appealing for this love.”

“Sometimes, what they teach you is absurd, and if you don’t challenge it, you negligently make flawed decisions in life. And this is particularly towards girl children. When your mama taught you to pray when your partner is abusing and mistreating you, her decision was informed from her own flawed self-esteem.”

“Being a child from outside, caregivers aren’t invested in your emotional development as much. They assume that having a roof over your head and food is enough. You can’t get away with being honest in these kinds of conversations without someone attempting to throw in some positivity and gratitude. But it never is about that; children need their emotional needs watered. And openly discussing this is where we begin to rectify the past.”

“Back then, I didn’t realize his willingness to remain harmful, that the desire to cause harm was a choice. Each time life presented him with an alternative to protect or hurt, he chose the latter without fail. He showed up intentionally to cause emotional harm, and that was who he was. He was a man who recklessly treated me, and I had no right to doubt his abilities.”

“Perhaps the uproar and the tantrum were the realization of the lack of control she had on the outcome of other team members' performance, that despite her desire to only be the one recognized, other team leads were comfortable praising their teammates.”

“The majority of the organizations assume that highly experienced individuals in certain areas, perhaps people with over 26 years' worth of work experience in the same company in specific expertise, make for great managers. Many organizations are being led by individuals who have been within the company for a significant number of years”

“Leadership is about transforming people. It is about recognizing the power you have and opt to use it for the greater good of the transformation of people within the team.”

“Men have been packaged by society so well as elusive and mysterious that if you score one for yourself, you are suddenly deemed worthy of respect. This form of advertising has aided men for years, with women placing their best foot forward to present themselves to be found worthy of a man’s approval.”

“. There were also multiple ways of earning an income that didn't pose a threat to my well-being. But there weren't various options to choose from when it came to life. I simply had one life, and it was up to me to create great experiences for myself. I”

“The issue with people-pleasing is that you gain nothing from it. You are constantly giving and overextending yourself to people who wouldn't do the same for you. These connections thrive well between parties that lack boundaries. The takers, who don't know when to stop taking, and the givers, who don't know when to stop giving”

“Due to the disbelief from the beginning, you don't realize that you are subjected to unbearable working conditions. There is also shame attached to it that if you quit, you suddenly appear to be weak.”

“Leadership is about transforming people. It is about recognizing the power you have and opt to use it for the greater good of the transformation of people within the team. Now, many folks who are suddenly handed leadership positions and lack people skills are the ones whose power becomes a tool to destroy the workplace and the people. For some, it becomes a means to control people and ensure that those beneath them feel the power they now have”

“I had, in the past, heard stories about people walking dead inside, and now I was living on the same page. I felt dead on the inside and still didn't want to make things better for myself.”