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Stanley Greenspan

Stanley Greenspan Books

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“A new world of complex relationships and feelings opens up when the peer group takes its place alongside the family as the emotional focus of the child's life. Early peer relationships contribute significantly to the child's ability to participate in a group (and in that sense, society), deal with competition and disappointment, enjoy the intimacy of friendships, and intuitively understand social relationships as they play out at school, in the neighborhood, and later in the workplace and adult family.”

WorldChildrenPlayFeelingsSchoolSocialEnjoyAbilityDealsFocusGroupsEmotionalAdultsCompetitionComplexesDisappointmentIntimacyNeighborhoodNew WorldPeersWorkplaceSocial RelationshipsPeer GroupComplex Relationships
Author:Stanley Greenspan
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“Parents are led to believe that they must be consistent, that is, always respond to the same issue the same way. Consistency is good up to a point but your child also needs to understand context and subtlety . . . much of adult life is governed by context: what is appropriate in one setting is not appropriate in another; the way something is said may be more important than what is said. . . .”

WayNeedsBelieveMayChildrenSaidImportantLife IsParentIssuesAdultsOur ChildrenSettingSettingsYour ChildrenConsistentAppropriateConsistencySubtlety
Author:Stanley Greenspan
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“To be motivated to sit at home and study, instead of going out and playing, children need a sense of themselves over time--they need to be able to picture themselves in the future.... If they can't, then they're simply reacting to daily events, responding to the needs of the moment--for pleasure, for affiliation, for acceptance.”

IfsNeedsChildrenMomentsHomeAblePleasureStudyEventsAcceptanceMotivatedGoing OutRespondingReactingAffiliation
Author:Stanley Greenspan
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“If our society were truly to appreciate the significance of children's emotional ties throughout the first years of life, it would no longer tolerate children growing up or parents having to struggle in situations which could not possibly nourish healthy growth.”

IfsYearsFirstsChildrenParentGrowthSituationStruggleGrowing UpGrowingEmotionalHealthyAppreciateTiesOur SocietySignificanceTolerateChildren Growing UpYears Of LifeGrowing Children
Author:Stanley Greenspan
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“Imagine driving a car that isn't working well. When you step on the gas the car sometimes lurches forward and sometimes doesn't respond. When you blow the horn it sounds blaring. The brakes sometimes slow the car, but not always. The blinkers work occasionally, the steering is erratic, and the speedometer is inaccurate. You are engaged in a constant struggle to keep the car on the road, and it is difficult to concentrate on anything else.”

WellsSometimesDifficultSoundStepsStruggleImagineCarConstantBlowDrivingEngagedGasHornsBrakeSteeringErraticConstant StruggleBlinkers
Author:Stanley Greenspan
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“We need to take a less narrow look at our children’s problems and, instead, see them as windows of opportunity—a way of exploring and understanding all facets of our children’s development. If we can understand the underlying developmental process, we can see a child’s struggles as signs of striving toward growth instead of chronic problems or attempts to aggravate adults.”

IfsWayNeedsLooksChildrenProblemOpportunityProcessUnderstandingGrowthStruggleDevelopmentAdultsWindowOur ChildrenStriveExploringFacetsDevelopmentalWindow Of Opportunity
Author:Stanley Greenspan
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“If you do a little bit of looking at books with your children and inspire them to be curious about the pictures and ... what the word means, but don't get into very structured systematic teaching at too early an age, and you also interact emotionally and have fun with pretend play ... then you have the best of both worlds.”

IfsWorldMeanChildrenLittlesBookPlayAgeFunBitsTeachingInspireLittle BitOur ChildrenCuriousHaving FunYour ChildrenSystematicBest Of Both Worlds
Author:Stanley Greenspan
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