“They are quite hopeless - drooling, driveling, doleful, depressing, dropsical drips.”
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Famous Thomas Beecham Quotes
“The sound of the harpsichord resembles that of a bird-cage played with toasting-forks.”
“The bagpipes sound exactly the same when you have finished as when you started”
“As you'll never hear the thing again, my boy, why not throw in a couple of brass bands?”
“At a rehearsal I let the orchestra play as they like. At the concert I make them play as I like.”
“If an opera cannot be played by an organ grinder, it's not going to achieve immortality.”
“If she is attractive, I can't perform with her; if she is not, then I won't.”
“Without question the most unpopular medium of musical sound in the world.”
“The English may not like music, but they absolutely love the noise it makes.”
“Brass bands are all very well in their place - outdoors and several miles away.”
“A musicologist is a man who can read music but cannot hear it.”
“Beethoven's last quartets were written by a deaf man and should only be listened to by a deaf man.”
“I have just been all round the world and have formed a very poor opinion of it.”
“Movie music is noise. It's even more painful than my sciatica.”
“The sound of a harpsichord - two skeletons copulating on a tin roof in a thunderstorm.”
“In the first movement alone, I took note of six pregnancies and at least four miscarriages.”
“What can you do with it? It's like a lot of yaks jumping about.”
“Her singing reminds me of a cart coming downhill with the brake on.”
“Composers should write tunes that chauffeurs and errand boys can whistle.”
“Too much counterpoint; what is worse, Protestant counterpoint.”
“The grand tune is the only thing in music that the great public really understands.”
“"Have you heard any Stockhausen?" Beecham was asked. "No, but I believe I have stepped in some."”
“Elgar's first symphony is the musical equivalent of St Pancras Railway Station.”
“There are no woman composers, never have been and possibly never will be.”
“The function of music is to release us from the tyranny of conscious thought.”
“All the arts in America are a gigantic racket run by unscrupulous men for unhealthy women.”