Humorous Quotes
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Humorous Quotes
“That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.”
“I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for.”
“I've always tried to explore the humorous aspects of life.”
“A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.”
“You can bear your own faults, and why not a fault in your wife?”
“God works wonders now and then; Behold a lawyer, an honest man.”
“A perfect method of adding drama to life is to wait until the deadline looms large.”
“Men like cars, women like clothes. Women only like cars because they take them to clothes.”
“My wife loves Europe, but to me it's a bad day at a theme park.”
“A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished.”
“My husband taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house.”
“Hark, the Herald Tribune sings, Advertising wondrous things!”
“If all else fails immortality can always be assured by adequate error.”
“There isn't any finer folks living than a Republican that votes the Democratic ticket.”
“Whatever is not nailed down is mine. What I can pry loose is not nailed down.”
“You've got to be (an) optimist to be a Democrat, and you've got to be a humorist to stay one”
“Every Harvard class should have one Democrat to rescue it from oblivion.”
“Zionism and pessimism are not compatible.”
“There is no income tax in Russia. But there's no income.”
“... an experienced, industrious, ambitious, and often quite often picturesque liar.”