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Wit Quotes

“The job of feets is walking, but their hobby is dancing.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“Politeness is the first thing people lose once they get the power.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“Father has a strengthening character like the sun and mother has a soothing temper like the moon.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“Networking isn't how many people you know, it's how many people know you.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“A farmer is a magician who produces money from the mud.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“During a conversation, listening is as powerful as loving.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“Robert Ingersoll's character was as nearly perfect as it is possible for the character of mortal man to be... none sweeter or nobler had ever blessed the world. The example of his life was of more value to posterity than all the sermons that were ever written on the doctrine of original sin... The genius for humor and wit and satire of a Voltaire, a wide amplitude of imagination, and a greatness of heart and brain that placed him upon an equal footing with the greatest thinkers of antiquity. He stands, at the close of his career, the first great reformer of the age. {Thomas' words at the funeral of the great Robert Ingersoll}”

LifeCharacterHumorImaginationPerfectExampleSweetGeniusHonorBlessingRespectPerfectionPraiseValueNobleWitManSatireAdmirationBlessSermonsPosterityAntiquityReformerOriginal SinGreatestMortalIngersollVoltaireRobert G IngersollRobert IngersollRobert Green Ingersoll
Author:Charles Spalding Thomas
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“If you can't impress them with your argument, impress them with your actions.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“If thinking should precede acting, then acting must succeed thinking.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“What I'd like to read is a scientific review, by a scientific psychologist--if any exists--of 'A Scientific Man and the Bible'. By what route do otherwise sane men come to believe such palpable nonsense? How is it possible for a human brain to be divided into two insulated halves, one functioning normally, naturally and even brilliantly, and the other capable only of such ghastly balderdash which issues from the minds of Baptist evangelists? Such balderdash takes various forms, but it is at its worst when it is religious. Why should this be so? What is there in religion that completely flabbergasts the wits of those who believe in it? I see no logical necessity for that flabbergasting. Religion, after all, is nothing but an hypothesis framed to account for what is evidentially unaccounted for. In other fields such hypotheses are common, and yet they do no apparent damage to those who incline to them. But in the religious field they quickly rush the believer to the intellectual Bad Lands. He not only becomes anaesthetic to objective fact; he becomes a violent enemy of objective fact. It annoys and irritates him. He sweeps it away as something somehow evil...”

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Book:American Mercury
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“The little stone Saint and the Goblin got on very well together, though they looked at most things from different points of view. The Saint was a philanthropist in an old fashioned way; he thought the world, as he saw it, was good, but might be improved. In particular he pitied the church mice, who were miserably poor. The Goblin, on the other hand, was of opinion that the world, as he knew it, was bad, but had better be let alone. It was the function of the church mice to be poor.”

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Book:Reginald in Russia and Other Sketches
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“In spite of being complicated people choose superstitions over common sense.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“[I]f you seek in every way to minimise my firm beliefs by your anti-feminist attacks, please recall that a small dagger or knife point can pierce a great, bulging sack and that a small fly can attack a great lion and speedily put him to flight.”

MenWomenFeminismSelf EsteemDignityPrejudiceGenderWitHypocrisyMisogynyBeliefsSlanderStereotypesPreconceptionsDouble StandardsInsultsClichésConvictionsReparteeSelf ImportanceAttacks
Book:Le Débat Sur Le Roman De La Rose
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“[S]ince you are angry at me without reason, you attack me harshly with, "Oh outrageous presumption! Oh excessively foolish pride! Oh opinion uttered too quickly and thoughtlessly by the mouth of a woman! A woman who condemns a man of high understanding and dedicated study, a man who, by great labour and mature deliberation, has made the very noble book of the Rose, which surpasses all others that were ever written in French. When you have read this book a hundred times, provided you have understood the greater part of it, you will discover that you could never have put your time and intellect to better use!" My answer: Oh man deceived by willful opinion! I could assuredly answer but I prefer not to do it with insult, although, groundlessly, you yourself slander me with ugly accusations. Oh darkened understanding! Oh perverted knowledge ... A simple little housewife sustained by the doctrine of Holy Church could criticise your error!”

MenWomenFeminismSelf EsteemDignityPrejudiceGenderWitHypocrisyMisogynyBeliefsSlanderStereotypesPreconceptionsDouble StandardsInsultsClichésConvictionsReparteeSelf ImportanceAttacks
Book:Le Débat Sur Le Roman De La Rose
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“Seeing the mud around a lotus is pessimism, seeing a lotus in the mud is optimism.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“Isolation has carved me in its image and likeness. The presence of another person – of any person whatsoever – instantly slows down my thinking, and while for a normal man contact with others is a stimulus to spoken expression and wit, for me it is a counterstimulus, if this compound word be linguistically permissible. When all by myself, I can think of all kinds of clever remarks, quick comebacks to what no one said, and flashes of witty sociability with nobody. But all of this vanishes when I face someone in the flesh: I lose my intelligence, I can no longer speak, and after half an hour I just feel tired. Yes, talking to people makes me feel like sleeping. Only my ghostly and imaginary friends, only the conversations I have in my dreams, are genuinely real and substantial, and in them intelligence gleams like an image in a mirror.”

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Book:The Book of Disquiet
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“Respect cannot be inherited, respect is the result of right actions.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“Parents expect only two things from their children, obedience in their childhood and respect in their adulthood.”

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Book:Wealth of Words
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“As a matter of fact, with all his wit, humor, raillery, persiflage, he was the profoundest logician that ever appealed to the intellect of an American audience. There was logic even in his laughter. He passed the cup of mirth, and in its sparkling foam were found the gems of unanswerable truth. {Kittredge on the great Robert Ingersoll}”

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Book:Ingersoll: A Biographical Appreciation
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