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Quote by Emo Philips

“I think fur looks better on an animal than on a human being. So I dress my dog in a mink teddy.”

Quote by Emo Philips

Author

Emo Philips, born on February 7, 1956, is a versatile entertainer known for his contributions to music, performance, and comedy. His unique style and humor have won him the affection of a wide audience. more

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“One man's pet-stained carpet is another man's Twister game.”

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Author:Emo Philips

“I took my grandmother to the emergency room. The doctor said that she was on an artificial life support system, and that although her brain was dead her heart was still beating. I though, "we've never had a democrat in the family before".”

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“One of the major problems encountered in time travel is not that of accidentally becoming your own father or mother. There is no problem involved in becoming your own father or mother that a broadminded and well-adjusted family can't cope with.”

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Book:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Omnibus: A Trilogy in Four Parts

Source: The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Omnibus: A Trilogy in Four Parts

“I want to commit a crime during a reenactment, and turn it into an enactment.”

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“A straw enables you to drink without using your wrist. A straw is your friend - until you lose eye contact with the straw. Then it will betray you and make you look like an idiot.”

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“A mobile home with a flat tire is a home.”

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“I think they should put pies on the fronts of trains, so that when they hit something it's at least a little bit funny.”

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“I wanna design a video game where you'd have to take care of all the people shot in all the other video games.”

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“DNA is an abbreviation for deoxyribonucleicantidisestablishmentarianism, a complex string of syllables.”

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Book:Dave Barry Is from Mars and Venus

Source: Dave Barry Is from Mars and Venus

“I believe that the voices of fear, both from without and within, can only be dispelled by trusting the voice that comes from the heart. Be still and listen to it. If it speaks of love and compassion for others, for the world itself, it just might be the voice of God - or a reasonable facsimile. If, however, it snarls with fear of the unknown, fear of losing what you have or of not getting what you want, then it just might be the voice of Rupert Murdoch - or a reasonable facsimile.”