“I was born in Honduras, that's where I was born. I live in California, where no matter what you say, you're Mexican. You understand that? It doesn't matter what you say. See - you don't understand that, white people, because wherever you go, you're white. You're here, you're white. You go to L. A., you're white. You go to Denver, you're white. You go to Miami, you're still white. In L. A. I'm a Mexican, In Florida, I'm a Cuban. In New York, I'm a Puerto Rican. And when I come to Canada and I find out I'm an Eskimo.” PeopleStillsMatterBornWhiteNew YorkNo Matter WhatCaliforniaCanadaFloridaMexicanMiamiCubanDenverHonduras Author:Carlos Mencia
“Dee Dee Dee dosen't mean mentally retarded. It means stupid. This song goes out to all the stupid people out there. Your gonna find this song hilarious, and you don't even know it's about you.” PeopleKnowsMeanSongStupidStupid PeopleRetardedMentally Retarded Author:Carlos Mencia
“If you're Filipino, you're the beaner of the Asian community 'cause you're just like us. You're indigenous people that got banged by some Spaniards. That's why you have names like Kwan Ping Del Toro.” PeopleIfsNamesCausesCommunityAsianIndigenousFilipinoIndigenous PeopleSpaniardsPing Author:Carlos Mencia
“I'm glad Hurricane Katrina happened. It taught us an important lesson: black people can't swim.” PeopleImportantBlackHappenedTaughtLessonsGladSwimBlack PeopleHurricanesTaught UsKatrinaImportant LessonsHurricane Katrina Author:Carlos Mencia
“Hurricane Katrina was caused by political correctness. I said it!” SaidPoliticalPoliticsHurricanesPolitical CorrectnessCorrectnessKatrinaHurricane Katrina Author:Carlos Mencia
“And for all of you at home, you are all welcome to visit my store. You are also welcome to park off you motherparking parks, and go park yourself. But remember, don't park in a handicapped spot.” HomeRememberStoresWelcomeSpotsParksHandicapped Author:Carlos Mencia
“Great soul of Gandhi, cover your ears. You will not want to hear this! Listen, you inbred piece of Ku Klux Krap! You white people love to be racist, but the only races you can tell apart are Indianapolis and Daytona. I hope I am reincarnated as toothpaste, so I never have to see you again. Now take your twelve-pack of wife-beating juice and get the park out of my store!” PeopleWantSoulWhiteRacePiecesWifeEarsStoresParksRacistOver YouTwelvePacksJuiceYou AgainGreat SoulsToothpasteIndianapolisInbredsDaytonaWife Beating Author:Carlos Mencia
“I'm the only person on Earth who's not afraid to admit that black people are better dancers than white people! I said it, I said it! You were all thinking it, I said it!” PeopleThinkingPersonsSaidEarthBlackWhiteDancerBlack PeopleNot Afraid Author:Carlos Mencia
“I'll admit it, the Holocaust was definitely a bad thing, but do we really need Jewish people around? They have big noses. I said it! I said it!” PeopleNeedsSaidBigsNosesBad ThingsHolocaustBig Nose Author:Carlos Mencia
“Call it the Tiger Mom effect: In the business world today, failure is apparently not an option.” WorldTodayEffectsMomCollectivesTigersWorld TodayBusiness World Author:Naveen Jain