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Nebraska Quotes

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Nebraska Quotes

“Eventually, I headed to the bathroom, and I mention this only because I saw in that bathroom the most quintessentially American artifact I have ever encountered: a bright blue rubber mat resting in the bottom of the urinal emblazoned with the following legend: Epply World's Cleanest Airport Omaha, NE God bless our relentless idiotic optimism.”

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Book:Candyfreak: A Journey Through the Chocolate Underbelly of America
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“Joshua took a gulp of his own brew. “Need I have some other cause, when this plague could devastate so many of my patients and neighbors? When, if some of the reports prove true, we might see the town reduced painfully in size, as farmers abandon their holdings and flee to the East?” If the thought of one particular family leaving town, of Clara Brook’s tall figure climbing aboard a wagon and vanishing beyond the horizon, gave him a peculiar twinge, he was hardly obliged to say so.”

Historical RomanceNebraskaAmerican WestGrasshopper Plague
Book:What Heals the Heart
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“I once saw a moat bicycling around a castle. It was being chased by a soggy giraffe that had a tornado for a neck. I was on the overlooking grassy hill, selling lasagna-free duck soup by the slice to tourists from Nebraska.”

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Book:Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.
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“Nebraska dark didn't close in, it stretched out...Broad stretching sky covering everything, everything, forever. He could see what was ahead in the beam of his headlights, but beyond that was more of the same. Of the same. Of the same. No tight corners or dead-ends. No earth-trapping suffocation. The opposite. There was nothing, forever, nothing, and he could breathe in and breathe in and breathe in and breathe in until his lungs exploded and there would still be more air, more wind, clawing its way down his useless throat. That was Nebraska.”

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Book:Inheritance
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“As one of the nation's top agricultural states, Nebraska has a great opportunity to provide input that will help shape the 2007 Farm Bill, .. This legislation will help determine commodity price supports, priorities with regard to conservation programs, as well as rural development, renewable energy and beginning farmer initiatives for several years to come.”

YearsWellsStatesHelpingOpportunityEnergyNationsSupportDevelopmentShapesProgramRegardBillsDeterminePrioritiesFarmsFarmersInitiativeAgricultureCommodityConservationLegislationInputRenewable EnergyGreat OpportunityNebraskaCommodity Prices
Author:Dave Heineman
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“I have really got it into my head to try to be United States Senator, and, if I could have your support, my chances would be reasonably good. But I know, and acknowledge, that you have as just claims to the place as I have; and therefore I cannot ask you to yield to me, if you are thinking of becoming a candidate, yourself. If, however, you are not, then I should like to be remembered affectionately by you; and also to have you make a mark for me with the Anti-Nebraska members down your way.”

IfsThinkingKnowsWayShouldTryingStatesWould BeAsksChanceUnitedUnited StatesSupportBecomingMembersClaimsMarkRememberedAcknowledgeCandidatesIf I CouldYieldSenatorsNebraska
Book:LINCOLN – Complete 7 Volume Edition: Biographies, Speeches and Debates, Civil War Telegrams, Letters, Presidential Orders & Proclamations: Including the Introduction by Theodore Roosevelt & 3 Biographies: The Every-day Life of the President, Lincoln by Carl Shurz and Abraham Lincoln by Joseph H. Choate
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“You say men ought to be hung for the way they are executing the law; I say the way it is being executed is quite as good as any of its antecedents. It is being executed in the precise way which was intended from the first, else why does no Nebraska man express astonishment or condemnation? Poor Reeder is the only public man who has been silly enough to believe that anything like fairness was ever intended, and he has been bravely undeceived.”

MenWayFirstsBelieveDoeHas BeensEnoughLawPoorOughtSillyFairnessHungPreciseCondemnationAstonishmentExecutingNebraska
Book:LINCOLN – Complete 7 Volume Edition: Biographies, Speeches and Debates, Civil War Telegrams, Letters, Presidential Orders & Proclamations: Including the Introduction by Theodore Roosevelt & 3 Biographies: The Every-day Life of the President, Lincoln by Carl Shurz and Abraham Lincoln by Joseph H. Choate
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“And meteorologists have nothing to tell people in Philo, who know perfectly well that the real story is that to the west, between us and the Rockies, there is basically nothing tall, and that weird zephyrs and stirs joined breezes and gusts and thermals and downdrafts and whatever out over Nebraska and Kansas and moved like streams into rivers and jets at and military fronts that gathered like avalanches and roared in reverse down pioneer oxtrails, toward our own personal unsheltered asses.”

PeopleKnowsWellsRealStoriesMilitaryFrontsRiversMovedWestAssStreamsTallReverseBreezeJetPioneersKansasNebraskaAvalanchesReal StoryZephyrMeteorologists
Author:David Foster Wallace
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“Certain kinds of things that the novel used to do, which was, "Oh, I'm living out here in West Nowhere, Nebraska and I'm curious how the upper class in New York City lives, I guess I'll read a novel about it." We don't have to do that now. You just turn on the TV. Turn on Lifestyles Of The Rich And Famous. You can get that information anywhere. Novels don't have to do that anymore.”

KindUsedCertainTurnsCitiesClassNovelRichInformationNew YorkTvsWestLifestyleCuriousNew York CityTurn-onCity LifeUpper ClassNebraska
Author:Jonathan Franzen
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“Living in a small town you couldn't go anywhere on a Saturday where a store had the game on. If you were downtown you heard the game. If you were at the gas station you heard the game. I remember I would be mowing the lawn and I would stop for the Nebraska game. I would have it cranking outside.”

IfsWould BeRememberGamesHeardTownsStoresGasStationsSaturdaySmall TownLawnsDowntownNebraskaGas StationsMowingMowing The LawnLiving In A Small Town
Author:Larry the Cable Guy
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“I follow the baseball team on the Internet more than I do the football team. Generally you can get a Nebraska game anywhere. Before I started doing big arenas and stuff and had a tour bus when I was just working comedy clubs way back when I would always listen to the games in my hotel room on the Internet.”

WayBigsGamesStuffRoomsComedyTeamFootballInternetBaseballClubsHotelBusArenaBack WhenFootball TeamHotel RoomsNebraskaComedy ClubsBaseball TeamWay Back When
Author:Larry the Cable Guy
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“Sanford is a little redneck town north of Orlando. It's right off Lake Jessup.Lake Jessup is the most alligator infested lake in the United States and I live literally 5/10ths of a mile north of that lake right off the swamp down here. I've lived here since '94. When I left Nebraska my dad got a job at a private Christian school in West Palm Beach. People will say "You're not really a country boy. You're from Palm Beach, Florida." Well, I moved to West Palm Beach, FL which is a far cry from Palm Beach, FL. There's a reason it's called West Palm Beach.”

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Author:Larry the Cable Guy
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“The United States does not have a very good record in the Middle East. I think they have the best of intentions but I think the problem is that it's very difficult from Washington, or from Iowa or Nebraska to understand what is happening in this crazy part of the world. In some cases US diplomacy has been somewhat naive.”

ThinkingWorldDoeHas BeensStatesProblemDifficultUnitedCasesUnited StatesRecordsCrazyMiddleHappeningsIntentionVery GoodEastMiddle EastDiplomacyNaiveIowaNebraskaGood Records
Author:Moshe Arens
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“Don't get me wrong. I like Disney World. The rest rooms are clean enough for neurosurgery, and the employees say things like "Howdy, folks!" and actually seem to mean it. You wonder: Where do they get these people? My guess: 1952. I think old Walt realized, way back then, that there would eventually be a shortage of cheerful people, so he put all the residents of south western Nebraska into a giant freezer with a huge picture of Jiminy Cricket on the outside, and the corporation has been thawing them out as needed ever since.”

PeopleThinkingWorldWayMeanHas BeensEnoughHumorSeemsFunnyRoomsWonderHugeNeededCleanSouthWesternFolksCorporationsGiantsEmployeeCricketCheerfulShortageResidentsWaltNebraskaFreezerNeurosurgeryThawing
Book:Dave Barry Talks Back
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“Every time someone does a Western movie, people flock to it. It's like, we're continually programming to people who are least likely to watch us. People in Nebraska aren't watching things on the computer, they're watching television. Why aren't we programming things for them? We only program things that appeal to New York and Los Angeles and in many ways spit on the rest of the country.”

PeopleWayDoeCountryWatchesNew YorkTelevisionComputerProgramWesternAppealsProgrammingLos AngelesSpitFlocksNebraskaWatching TelevisionWestern Movie
Author:Edward Allen Bernero
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