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Quote by Jon Stewart

“What would Jesus, or any human being who isn't an asshole, do?”

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Jon Stewart, born on November 28, 1962, is an American satirist, comedian, writer, and television host. He is best known for his work on 'The Daily Show', where he used satire and humor to deeply analyze American politics and social issues. more

“I was modest--they accused me of being crafty: I became secretive. I felt deeply good and evil--nobody caressed me, everybody offended me: I became rancorous. I was gloomy--other children were merry and talkative. I felt myself superior to them--but was considered inferior: I became envious. I was ready to love the whole world--none understood me: and I learned to hate.”

World Children Whole Hate Evil Felt Ready Understood Whole World Superiors Good And Evil Inferiors Modest Offended Accused Merry Envious Gloomy Secretive Crafty Talkative Ready For Love

Author:Mikhail Lermontov

“You are the devil to talk to, Rachel," he said curtly. "Will you shut up and listen?”

Said Devil Shut Up

Book:Ever After

Source: Ever After

“And the seasons they go 'round and 'round And the painted ponies go up and down We're captive on the carousel of time We can't return we can only look behind From where we came And go round and round and round In the circle game.”

Looks Time Games Behinds Return Seasons Rounds Circles Up And Down Captives Ponies Where We Came Carousels

Author:Joni Mitchell

“You can be merry with the king, you can share a joke with him. But as Thomas More used to say, it's like sporting with a tamed lion. You tousle its mane and pull its ears, but all the time you're thinking, those claws, those claws, those claws.”

Thinking Used Share Kings Jokes Ears Lions Merry Claws Tamed

Author:Hilary Mantel

“But I knew Nick. He was too ugly to die.”

Dies Ugly

Author:Kim Harrison

“The one person who will never leave us, whom we will never lose, is ourself. Learning to love our female selves is where our search for love must begin.”

Persons Self Loses Self Love Female Learning To Love Searching For Love

Author:Bell Hooks

“...and it occurred to me, with the forcefulness of a thought experienced in 360 degrees, that that's really what history mostly is: masses of people doing ordinary things.”

People Degrees Mass Ordinary Ordinary Things

Author:Bill Bryson

“They all do the same things. They may think their sins are original, but for the most part they are petty and repetitive.”

Thinking May Sin Originals Petty Repetitive

Author:Neil Gaiman

Quote by Jon Stewart

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