“Americans are cool, if you show just a chink of vulnerability, they respond so much. They'll pat you on the arm and say, 'Hey kid, you're all right'. Brits will respond but they are much more cynical.” IfsShowsKidsArmsHeyVulnerabilityCynicalBritsChinks Author:Bear Grylls
“I have always felt comedy and tragedy are roommates. If you look up comedy and tragedy, you will find a very old picture of two masks. One mask is tragedy. It looks like its crying. The other mask is comedy. It looks like its laughing. Nowadays, we would say, How tasteless and insensitive. A comedy mask is laughing at a tragedy mask.” IfsLooksTwoFeltLaughingComedyCryTragedyLook UpMaskInsensitiveRoommateOld Picture Author:Gilbert Gottfried
“My Bubbie lived to 104, which is probably a little too old to consider a ripe old age, because she had already started to turn. I still say she died young.” LittlesStillsAgeYoungTurnsDiedOld AgeRipe Book:Rubber Balls and Liquor Source: Rubber Balls and Liquor
“I found out about Jonathan Winters death a day after it happened. That seems wrong. A talent like his should be more revered. The world knew about Kim Kardashians divorce before she did.” WorldShouldSeemsFoundHappenedTalentWinterDivorceKim Author:Gilbert Gottfried
“If a comedian tells a joke that you find funny, you laugh. If he tells a joke you do not find funny, dont laugh. Or you could possibly go as far as groaning or rolling your eyes. Then you wait for his next joke; if thats funny, then you laugh. If its not, you dont laugh - or at very worst, you can leave quietly.” IfsEyeNextWaitingLaughingWorstJokesComedianRollingGroaning Author:Gilbert Gottfried
“One thing I can take credit for, along with the rest of show business, is when the red ribbons were out, we cured AIDS. Any advancements that came towards fighting AIDS were not done by scientists or doctors - it was people with little ribbons on their lapels.” PeopleLittlesI CanDoneShowsFightingOne ThingRedDoctorsScientistCreditAidsShow BusinessAdvancementRibbonsRed Ribbon Author:Gilbert Gottfried
“People have many theories about comedy, but being just plain funny is the one most important thing.” PeopleImportantComedyTheoryImportant Things Author:Gilbert Gottfried
“I was the class podiatrist. I never made it to class clown. I wasn't funny enough. I would examine feet and prescribe and ointment. It was a sad childhood.” MadeEnoughClassFeetChildhoodMade ItClown Author:Gilbert Gottfried
“With the Internet, if you erase something it just means you have to spend another half-minute to find it.” IfsMeanHalfMinutesInternetErase Author:Gilbert Gottfried