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Quote by Carol Leifer

“Making love to a woman is like buying real estate: location, location, location.”

Quote by Carol Leifer

Book:When You Lie About Your Age, the Terrorists Win: Reflections on Looking in the Mirror

Work

When You Lie About Your Age, the Terrorists Win: Reflections on Looking in the Mirror

This book delves into the psychological and social implications of age deception, examining how lying about one's age can influence personal experiences and societal reactions. more

Author

Carol Leifer, born on July 27, 1956, is an American comedian known for her unique sense of humor and witty dialogue. She gained fame for her work in various comedy programs, including 'Saturday Night Live' and 'The Carol Leifer Show'. Leifer's career began in the 1980s, and she has since made a significant impact in the comedy world. more

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“Women, stop buying the lingerie. Stop buying it right now. Oh, it's a big rip off. Oh my god, $18 bucks for panties this big? Come on, one trip through the dryer, and it's a frilly bookmark.”

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“Stand-up comedy - I love this job, and I gotta tell you, folks - knock wood - it's been working. 'Cause I was one of those kind of people, even when I had a regular job, I couldn't even call in sick right. You know, I was like, 'Hello? Yeah, I can't come in today. I have scurvy.”

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“Oh, this is fun - went to a nude beach for the first time. Yeah, that's what I thought. You ever been to a nude beach? Thought it would be all sexy and hot. Oh my God, what a flubber fest! Everybody who shouldn't be naked is naked - didn't make me want to take off my clothes, made me want to take out my contacts.”

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“Women in the workplace - we still have big strides to make. Girlfriend of mine just got a new job. First question the new boss asked her was if she could make a good cup of coffee... Yeah, she stormed right out of that Starbucks.”

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“You can never go wrong betting on Americans' bad eating habits. So I've made a ton investing in all fast food chains, while at the same time investing in Dockers, spandex, Spanx, and sweatpants. Basically, anything with an elastic waistband is a goldmine.”

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“When you lie about your age, the terrorists win.”

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“I recently became vegan because I felt that as a Jewish lesbian, I wasn't part of a small enough minority. So now I'm a Jewish lesbian vegan.”

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“The more you focus on sex without love, and drugs and violence, lifestyle of intimidation and recycling, the less energy you spend on opening up the big tent.”

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“Long Island - if you're from out of town, how would I describe it? Well, every girl in my neighborhood looked like Kenny G.”

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