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Help! My Face Is Falling!: Aging: No Grace Required

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Gabrielle Jordan

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“According to Einstein, gravity is not a force but the shape of space curvature in the spacetime continuum. If gravity is not a force, and it is not, but the effect of the curvature of space, then the curvature of space is the effect of motion. This spacetime continuum and, consequently, the curvature of space would not be possible without spaceless space and timeless time. Spaceless space is infinity, and timeless time is eternity. Spaceless and timeless are the basis for space and time. Universal Mind is the basis for creation. This creation is the creation of the World (“matter”), space with curvatures, and time that can be “measured.” Without an absolute void, there would be no space, and there would be no time. Without space, time, in its real sense, is not possible.”

MatterTimeUniverseSpaceRelativityEinsteinCurvature Of SpaceSpacetime Continuum
Book:ABSOLUTE
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“Excerpt— So, let’s review, Doc… To maintain this ‘effortlessly’ youthful appearance of mine, I’ll need to schedule hormone therapy, use a daily regimen of retinol and vitamin C for my face, apply cream tighteners for my neck, engage in about a thousand facial exercises a day, and even sleep on my head for good anti-gravity measure. Oh, and let’s not forget walking around the house with a pulsating light laser on my face. And of course, maintaining a rabbit-ona-food-strike diet and drinking water until I’m sick of the taste. No more wine, just CBD mood relaxers, and don’t forget the waist cincher! The more out of breath, the better. There’s minoxidil for my shedding hair, collagen supplements, and protein peptides. Then there are the laser treatments, bi-annual Botox, and facial injections. And let’s not forget, the copper socks for ankle swelling, magnetic bracelets and rings, and higher strength readers every few months. Not to mention, keeping a handy lighted magnifier near my bed for emergencies and replacement pillowcases for the heat and sweat eruptions. For the aches and pains, there’s Ibuprofen for my back. And let’s not forget, to keep arthritis at bay (and keep my hands from looking like a turnip), hot paraffin wax—and giant sock and foot booties at bedtime... all while staring at the ceiling like a zombie at 3 am with my neck floating in a tsunami of sweat. ...And just when I thought I could relax, I’ve got to try my best to make painful sex winces sound like erotic pleasure groans, (all for his precious ego). Resist the urge to give my hubby just one good slap square across his face for just being a man. And not be pissed at his ability to jump up, take a shower, shave, and be out the door in 20 minutes. And most importantly, every single day, deliver a smile for the cameras and say, “I feel freaking awesome”!!! So, Doc, when do I get to kick back and enjoy life?”

Humorous QuotesWomen QuotesAging QuotesAnti AgingAging BodyMenopause QuotesHumor AgingHumor Women
Book:Help! My Face Is Falling!: Aging: No Grace Required
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“A never-ending nightmare on earth has plagued my life. Each day is a constant struggle against the forces of evil, filled with fear and torment. As a result, I have found solace in the simple act of sleeping - a temporary escape from the unimaginable horrors that await me in the waking world. Many may not fully understand the true extent of my suffering, for I am under the control of Akathisia - metaphorically, Satan himself. Yet, I refuse to allow this affliction to define me or dictate my actions. Despite the darkness that surrounds me, I persevere with unwavering determination, determined to overcome this insurmountable challenge and reclaim my life.”

DepressionResilienceSchizophreniaAkathisiaPrescription MedicationFear And TormentNever Ending NightmaresSolace In SleepStruggle Against EvilUnimaginable Horrors
Author:Jonathan Harnisch
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“When autumn gusts blew in from the Rideau Lakes, parched brown leaves swirled and scattered around the sides of the neglected building, forming mounds like grave-markers, for ghosts of the past, who lingered on the dust-covered dance floor.”

Dance FloorAutumn LeavesGhosts Of The PastLanark CountyDance HallsAntler LodgeRideau FerryRideau Lakes
Book:Lanark County Connections - Memories Among the Maples
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