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Joshua Shapiro

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“I am concussed,' I announced, entirely sure of my self-diagnosis. ''You're fine,' Takumi said as he jogged back towards me. ''Let's get out of here before we're killed.'' ''I'm sorry,' I said. ''But I can't get up. I have suffered a mild concussion.'' Lara ran out and sat down next to me. ''Are you OK?'' ''I am concussed,'' I said. Takumi sat down with me and looked me in the eye. ''Do you know what happened to you?'' ''The beast got me.'' ''Do you know where you are?'' ''I'm on a triple-and-a-half date.'' ''You're fine,'' Takumi said. ''Let's go.'' And then I leaned forward and threw up on Lara's pants.”

“So what’s the rule of thumb? Some say you should always match your socks to your shoes. Others say you should always match your socks to your pants. The correct answer is pants. And so in the case of jeans and brown shoes, I would go with navy socks. One note on sock-and-pant etiquette: if you’re wearing socks with dress pants, you should reveal no leg skin. It’s like a bare midriff: you don’t want to see it. It’s different if you’re wearing shoes without socks, which is fine in casual settings.”