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Quote by Jasun Ether

“Sharon, your wife, uploaded several photos of your urine-peppered toilet on a wives’ forum under the thread title THE IDIOT SATURATED THE TOILET AGAIN, and also under the thread title BAD AIM, A SMALL-DICK PREDICAMENT.”

Book:The Beasts of Success

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The Beasts of Success

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Jasun Ether

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“He took her hand in his and knelt before her. Valkyrie looked at him. He was serious. (...)'Dude, I'm sixteen.' 'I love you.' 'That doesn't make me any older. Stand up.' 'Not until you say yes.' 'You're going to shuffle around on your knees for the rest of your life? Stand up, for God's sake.' 'Be my wife.' 'Shut the hell up.”

Humour

Book:Death Bringer

Source: Death Bringer

“You also would love to hang out with Logan. And don’t even try to deny, you think Logan is super-hot. I know you. You like him, and he likes you. He was insanely worried about you last night. He’s either head over heels for you or he’s your guardian angel. He was insanely worried about you last night. If I didn’t know you had just met, I would swear he was in love with you.” Meredith said in an excited tone.”

Literature Fiction Magic Mystery Humour Adventure Drama Paranormal Urban Fantasy Teen Ya

Book:Shifting Moon: Shifting Moon Saga, Book 1

Source: Shifting Moon: Shifting Moon Saga, Book 1

“CUSTOMER (to her friend): What's this literary criticism section? Is it for books that complain about other books?”

Humour Literary Criticism

Book:Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops

Source: Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops

“She likes me. I can tell. Problem is, she won’t admit that to the boyfriends she brings over.”

Politics Fiction Humour Horror Science Fiction Paranormal Sci Fi Literary Fiction Short Stories

Book:The Odd and The Strange: A Collection of Very Short Fiction

Source: The Odd and The Strange: A Collection of Very Short Fiction

“She'd proven to be one of the most aggravating people I'd ever met. Unfortunately for me, she was also the best sex I'd ever had. Fuck, he'd better never get that far. I wasn't sure I knew where to hide a body around here.”

Humour Bennett Ryan

Book:Beautiful Bastard

Source: Beautiful Bastard

“Torture?” she asked with a laugh. “My first piece of information I’ll divulge to you? I wouldn’t recommend trying to torture me. I dislike it and grow sulky under pincers. It’s a fault.”

Humor Humour

Book:The Warlord Wants Forever

Source: The Warlord Wants Forever

“Putting a damp spoon back in the bowl is the tea-drinking equivalent of sharing a needle. And I did not want to end up with the tea-drinking equivalent of AIDS.”

Humour Tea

Book:I, Partridge: We Need to Talk About Alan

Source: I, Partridge: We Need to Talk About Alan

“It seemed as though he would never pull free, until he awoke one morning feeling kind of awkward, as though his hands had been lopped off by some Arabian sword during a routine druggie blackout, and in their place, pale and membranous hands that had been fit to his wrists by aliens that took him up while he slept and then brought him back down – all of it in an effort to help him move up to where he belonged in society.”

Politics Fiction Humour Horror Science Fiction Paranormal Sci Fi Literary Fiction Short Stories

Book:The Odd and The Strange: A Collection of Very Short Fiction

Source: The Odd and The Strange: A Collection of Very Short Fiction

Quote by Jasun Ether

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