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Quote by Evita Wren

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Harper's Landing

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Evita Wren

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“Grief isn’t linear. It comes in waves. Some are tsunamis—early on, most of them are. They knock your legs away again and again and again. You never have time to get back to your feet. Over time, the waves get smaller. It doesn’t get easier, just more manageable—but right after you lose someone, where you’re learning your new reality without them in it, it’s like being on the beach as a little kid, and you see the water coming, and you know that no matter what you do, you can’t get out of the way in time. What people don’t tell you is that sometimes, the waves can get real big again for no reason. They come out of nowhere and steal your breath, and it hurts just as bad, even after years. Decades.”

“After Rose, I had so much guilt and it simmered for a long time, until after Sarah left, and it started boiling until my head became a pressure cooker, my body vibrating with energy that had no outlet. Until I cross-threaded a screw while I was fixing the bay door at the Firehouse, and it was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I lost my fucking mind, that way you do when it’s been building for too long, and when you finally snap, it’s at something you can’t realistically blame or punish, like an inopportune papercut, hitting your head on a cupboard door, or trying to put your jacket on, but your sleeve is inside out so your arm gets stuck.”