“A Mormon told me that they don't drink coffee. I said, "A cup of coffee every day gives you wonderful benefits." He said, "Like what?" I said, "Well, it keeps you from being Mormon ..."” GivingWellsSaidHumorFunnyWonderfulDrinkBenefitsCoffeeCupsCoffee Cup Author:Emo Philips
“And I like to keep whatever is mine remaining that way. It's a funny little game to play and it's a slippery slope. I always say to myself I'm never going to give anything away because there's never any point or benefit for me.” WayGivingLittlesPlayFunnyGamesMinesBenefitsSlipperySlopesSlippery Slope Author:Kristen Stewart
“My mother told me that life isn't always about pleasing yourself and that sometimes you have to do things for the sole benefit of another human being. I completely agreed with her, but reminded her that that was what blow jobs were for.” GivingHumansSometimesFunnyJobsMotherSexHuman BeingsComedyBenefitsBlowSoleBlow Job Author:Chelsea Handler