“According to the Rand McNally Places-Rated Almanac, the best place to live in America is the city of Pittsburgh. The city of New York came in twenty-fifth. Here in New York we really don't care too much. Because we know that we could beat up their city anytime.” KnowsHumorCareFunnyAmericaCitiesToo MuchNew YorkBeatsTwentiesDon't CareFifthPlaces To LiveBest PlacePittsburghCaring Too Much Author:David Letterman
“The way a man looks at himself in a mirror will tell you if he can ever care about anyone else.” IfsMenWayLooksHumorCareFunnyMirrors Author:Rita Rudner
“If I'm the president, we're going to have emergency-room care, we're going to have gag orders.” IfsHumorCarePoliticalOrderPresidentRoomsEmergenciesPolitical HumorGagsEmergency Room Author:George W. Bush