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Percent Quotes

“Ninety-nine percent is in the delivery. If you have the right voice and the right delivery, you're cocky enough, and you pound down on the punch line, you can say anything and make people laugh maybe three times before they realize you're not telling jokes.”

People Ifs Enough Three Voice Realizing Lines Laughing Jokes Percent Nine Pounds Say Anything Three Times Ninety Making People Laugh Delivery Cocky Ninety Nine

Author:Buddy Hackett

“Iceland is 50 percent Celtic blood, from the females that they stole from us, which is why our country has only got dogs left. It was a joke! I'll never be let back in Scotland again!”

Country Left Blood Dog Jokes Percent Female Our Country Scotland Celtic Iceland

Author:Gerard Butler

“I'm making fun of midwestern homophobia [in the joke], but I'm still saying faggot. And almost every month as I'm doing that joke it gets five percent less of a laugh.”

Stills Fun Laughing Five Months Jokes Percent Homophobia

Author:Neal Brennan

“If you just heard 90 percent of dentists recommend something, it's too statistical. Nine out of 10 says: Well, it's just virtually everyone. It leads you to think of that joke about the one dentist. But so much of communication.”

Ifs Thinking Wells Heard Communication Jokes Percent Nine Dentist

Author:Frank Luntz

“The studying, the books, exams, arguments, theories. The jokes and pints, laughter, kisses and songs. Life was like running, ninety percent sweat and toil, ten per cent joy.”

Book Running Joy Song Study Theory Ten Kissing Laughter Jokes Percent Argument Sweat Cents Toil Ninety Exam Pints

Author:Siobhan Dowd

“And spare me the jokes about scoring." "Dammit, woman, you read my mind," he said. "Is there no filthy wordplay you can't forsee?" "It's my special magical power. I can read your mind when you're thinking dirty thoughts." "So, ninety-five percent of the time.”

Thinking Mind Said I Can Five Special Jokes Percent Dirty Spares Ninety Filthy Wordplay I Can Read Dirty Thoughts

Book:Cassandra Clare: The Mortal Instruments Series (5 books): City of Bones; City of Ashes; City of Glass; City of Fallen Angels, City of Lost Souls

Source: Cassandra Clare: The Mortal Instruments Series (5 books): City of Bones; City of Ashes; City of Glass; City of Fallen Angels, City of Lost Souls