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President Quotes

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President Quotes

“President Obama has said that our aspirations should be realistic. We are not going to turn one of the poorest countries in the world, that was plunged into 30 years of war, into an advanced, industrialized, Western-style democracy. What we want to achieve is Afghanistan's capacity to secure and govern itself.”

World Want Should Years Said War Country Turns President Democracy Achieve Style Capacity Western Secure Aspiration Realistic Afghanistan President Obama Poorest

Author:David Petraeus

“As a dad, you are the Vice President of the executive branch of parenting. It doesn't matter what your personality is like, you will always be Al Gore to your wife's Bill Clinton. She feels the pain and you are the annoying nerd telling them to turn off the lights.”

Feels Matter Light Pain Turns President Wife Like You Personality Dad Bills Clinton Vices Branches Executives Als Annoying Nerd Gore Vice President Turn Off Executive Branch

Author:Jim Gaffigan

“It's interesting what former presidents do when they leave office. Bush is now working as a motivational speaker. And if you want to be motivated, who better to turn to than the guy who invaded the wrong country and started a depression.”

Ifs Want Country Guy Turns President Interesting Office Former Motivated Speakers Motivational Speakers

Author:David Letterman

“In the history of mankind many republics have risen, have flourished for a less or greater time, and then have fallen because their citizens lost the power of governing themselves and thereby of governing their state; and in no way has this loss of power been so often and so clearly shown as in the tendency to turn the government into a government primarily for the benefit of one class instead of a government for the benefit of the people as a whole.”

Source: Addresses and Presidential Messages of Theodore Roosevelt, 1902-1904

“It turns out that President Obama has acid reflux. He had a sore throat, went to the hospital, and they diagnosed it as acid reflux. Talk about irony -- it's not covered by Obamacare.”

Turns President Irony Hospitals Covered Throat President Obama Acid Obamacare Sore Throat Acid Reflux

Author:David Letterman

“Can you let your son's body become the same temperature as your son's head before you turn this into a political campaign against the president? Could you do that?”

Body Political Turns President Son Campaigns Temperature Your Son Political Campaign

Author:Glenn Beck

“You cannot give the vice president the authority to declassify specific information and then turn around and say he can just give carte blanche to an assistant of his to declassify whatever he wants.”

Want Giving Turns President Information Authority Vices Assistants Vice President Blanche

Author:Joe Biden

“For the first time ever, a black Republican woman has been elected to Congress. President Obama told her, 'You are all set. This country never turns against a black anything.'”

Firsts Has Beens Country Turns Black President Republican First Time Congress President Obama

Author:Conan O'Brien

“Hillary Clinton, President Obama, they're trying to turn the American dream into the European nightmare. We need to rescue the country from socialism.”

Needs Trying Country Dream Turns President Clinton Socialism Nightmare President Obama American Dream Rescue

Author:Bobby Jindal

“All of our presidents come into office looking so vigorous ... They grow grayer and grayer, and by the time they leave, they’re as white as the building they live in ... I have one big advantage: I’ve been coloring my hair for years. So you’re not going to see me turn white in the White House.”

Years Bigs Turns House Grows President White Building Hair Office Advantage White House Vigorous

Author:Hillary Clinton

“The White House again refused to turn over discussions Vice President Cheney had with Enron officials over energy policy. Cheney said if he had to disclose every time some business donated a ton of money then came in to write its own policy to govern itself, he wouldn't get any work done.”

Ifs Writing Said Done Turns House Energy President White Policy Vices Discussion Officials White House Vice President Work Done Enron Energy Policy

Author:Dennis Miller

“The president is the cuticle of the nail bed of America: one would think pushing back makes him stronger, yet it turns out the opposite is true.”

Thinking America Turns President Bed Opposites Stronger Pushing Nails Pushing Back

Author:Warren G. Harding

“The loneliest feeling in the world is when you think you are leading the parade and turn to find that no one is following you. No president who badly misguesses public opinion will last very long.”

Thinking World Long Feelings Lasts Turns President Opinion Following Public Opinion Parades

Author:Franklin D. Roosevelt

“If I were president, I would turn the tables and allow the fetus to abort its mother.”

Ifs Mother Turns President Tables Fetus

Author:David Sedaris

“"Hail to the Chief" was played, and the President got up and made a gracious opening remark. "I've been in this office for six years, and yet every time I hear that music, I turn around wondering who they're playing it for."”

Years Made Funny Turns President Wonder Office Six Opening Chiefs Remarks Gracious Hail Reaganomics

Author:Kirk Douglas

“I know I made plenty of mistakes in my tenure. But one of the things that you learn is to be very careful and to protect yourself down the road a little bit, which is to say you've got to think ahead and think where is the story going to go? What are all the possible outcomes? And how do I protect the president from unexpected twists and turns in the road?”