“As you may or may not know, in keeping with the high-class tone of Beverly Hills, our police force is probably the most snobbish group of gendarmes in the world. It is said that the Beverly Hills Police Department is so fancy that it has an unlisted number.” KnowsWorldMaySaidFunnyForceNumbersClassGroupsPoliceHillsCaliforniaToneFancyDepartmentPolice ForceBeverly HillsPolice DepartmentSnobbishHigh Class Author:Jack Benny
“We were ensconced as guests of the exclusive Beverly Hilton Hotel, an edifice so swank that the fire ax in the hall outside our suite said: "In case of fire-break crystal."” SaidFunnyBreakCasesFireCaliforniaHotelHallsGuestsExclusiveCrystalsEdificeSwank Author:Jack Paar
“Arnold Schwarzenegger is gonna be the new governor of California. During his acceptance speech Arnold said 'I will not let you down.' Unfortunately, at the time Arnold was holding a woman over his head and looking up her dress.” SaidAcceptanceSpeechDressesCaliforniaGovernorsSchwarzeneggerAcceptance Speech Author:Conan O'Brien
“Arnold was on the 'Today' show today, he was a little light on specifics. He said he could solve California's $38 billion budget deficit, without cutting spending or raising taxes because there was a third way. What is it? Let's just say it involves a robot going back in time to convince Gray Davis to go into dentistry.” WayLittlesSaidShowsLightTodayCuttingTaxesThirdsSolveSpendingBillionsBudgetsCaliforniaConvinceGrayRobotsDeficitBack In TimeSpecificsGo Back In TimeDentistryRaising TaxesBudget Deficit Author:Bill Maher