“I kind of do it in my head, then I'll try pieces of it on stage and if it looks promising, I'll put it together.” IfsTryingLooksKindTogetherComedyPiecesStage Author:Bob Newhart
“I never had an aversion because I was active in the drama club. If I had that aversion I certainly wouldn't put myself in the position of being on stage. Of course, in the drama club you're hiding behind a character.” IfsCharacterCoursesBehindsComedyStagePositionDramaClubsActiveHidingAversionDrama Club Author:Bob Newhart
“I don't want to find the secret. I'm afraid all the joy will go out of it if I find the secret.” IfsWantJoySecret Author:Bob Newhart
“You should have a value system. You can win if you stick with your value system.” IfsShouldValuesWinningShould HaveSticksYou Can WinValue Systems Author:Bob Newhart
“Marriage and fatherhood heighten the disillusion that we all think we are born handy. We confidently believe that we can fix things around the house, as if it's part of the collective brain that was further enhanced by eighth-grade shop class.” IfsThinkingBelieveHouseBornBrainClassShopsGradesCollectivesFatherhoodHandyDisillusionEighth Grade Author:Bob Newhart
“I'm most proud of the longevity of my marriage, my kids, and my grandchildren. If you don't have that, you really don't have very much.” IfsKidsMarriageComedyProudLongevityGrandchildrenMy Grandchildren Author:Bob Newhart
“I've been told to speed up my delivery when I perform. But if I lose the stammer, I'm just another slightly amusing accountant.” IfsLosesSpeedAmusingDeliveryAccountants Author:Bob Newhart
“When you're going for a joke, you're stuck out there if it doesn't work. There's nowhere to go. You've done the drum role and the cymbal clash and you're out on the end of the plank.” IfsEndsDoneRolesJokesStuckClashNowhere To GoCymbals Author:Bob Newhart
“There are a lot of questions I keep asking myself about why I do comedy. I guess I laugh to keep from crying. And I guess if you ever get me crying, I might not stop. This is the way I look at tragedy or else I'll cry.” IfsWayLooksMightLaughingComedyCryTragedyAsking Author:Bob Newhart
“Well, if you’re a native Chicagoan, you know how dumb he [Dr. Robert Hartley] is. He gets on the Ravenswood El, he goes past his stop on Sheridan Road, he gets off in Evanston, where the El is on the ground, and then he walks back 55 blocks to his apartment. Now, would you want to have that man as a psychologist? A man who misses his stop every day?” IfsKnowsMenWantWellsPastWalksKnow HowMissingBlockDumbNativeApartmentDrsPsychologist Author:Bob Newhart
“But I really believe that if you have the ability, there is an obligation to make people laugh” PeopleIfsBelieveAbilityLaughingObligationMaking People Laugh Author:Bob Newhart
“I really don't know what makes a comedian. I think it's a family background and environment. Yet if you put the same ingredients in another person, he may never utter a funny line.” IfsThinkingKnowsMayPersonsLinesEnvironmentBackgroundsComedianIngredientsFamily Background Author:Bob Newhart
