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Tony Kornheiser Biography

Columnist

Tony Kornheiser is a renowned columnist, born on July 13, 1948. His work is known for its humor and insightful analysis, primarily focusing on sports, politics, and social issues.

Related Quotes

“Everyone who ever walked barefoot into his child's room late at night hates Legos.”

Children Night Hate Rooms Late Sarcasm Sarcastic Barefoot Legos

Author:Tony Kornheiser

“We think Eli is taller and handsomer now that he's won the Super Bowl. Imagine what would've happened if [Jaws] won the Super Bowl.”

Ifs Thinking Imagine Happened Bowls Super Bowl

Author:Tony Kornheiser

“The players need to remember to run with their bodies above their legs.”

Needs Body Running Remember Player Legs

Author:Tony Kornheiser

“When you put yourself out there as an expert and the people you are trying to attract are people who want to do the very show you are doing, guys standing around, sitting around arguing with each other over sports, if you make a mistake that lights up like a flare in the middle of the night. You've just got to correct that or else they're going to say, 'Well, why do these dopes have that show? I can go out there and be just as good as them.'”

“Men are clinging to football on a level we aren't even aware of. For centuries, we ruled everything, and now, in the last ten minutes, there are all these incursions by women. It's our Alamo.”

Men Lasts Levels Minutes Century Football Ten Clinging American Football Funny Football Funny American Football Alamo

Author:Tony Kornheiser

“So instead of the Super Bowl, we've got the Stupor Bowl. Two once-proud teams, now 0-4 and stumbling through the season like zombies. And if you think the Cowboys are bad (and they are), the Redskins are so bad that every few plays you have to put a mirror under thieir noses to make sure they're still breathing.”

Ifs Thinking Stills Two Play Team Football Proud Seasons Mirrors Breathing Noses Bowls Cowboy Zombie Super Bowl Stumbling Redskins

Author:Tony Kornheiser

“Hannah Storm in a horrifying, horrifying outfit today. She's got on red go-go boots and a catholic school plaid skirt ... way too short for somebody in her 40s or maybe early 50s by now...She's got on her typically very, very tight shirt. She looks like she has sausage casing wrapping around her upper body ... I know she's very good, and I'm not supposed to be critical of ESPN people, so I won't ... but Hannah Storm ... come on now! Stop! What are you doing? ... She's what I would call a Holden Caulfield fantasy at this point.”

“The Bears treat offense as if its bubonic plague.”

Ifs Bears Treats Offense Plague Bubonic Plague

Author:Tony Kornheiser

“Someone I talked to who covered auto racing for a lot of years said she believed there was a 60 percent chance that Junior qualified with a car not quite up to code and people looked the other way because there’s no points involved [with the pole].”

People Way Years Said Chance Car Involved Percent Code Covered Racing Qualified Juniors No Point Auto Racing

Author:Tony Kornheiser

“He is already past the high point in his life and coming down on the other side. By next week he'll be nostalgia. He's 12 years old, and it's over for him.”

Years Past Next Sides Week Nostalgia Next Week High Points

Author:Tony Kornheiser

“Ivan Lendl is a robot, a solitary, mechanical man who lives with his dogs behind towering walls at his estate in Connecticut. A man who so badly wants to have a more human image that he's having surgery to remove the bolts from his neck.”

Men Want Humans Behinds Dog Wall Tennis Necks Remove Solitary Estates Surgery Robots Bolts Connecticut

Author:Tony Kornheiser

“I've got about 27 gigs right now. I've got radio, I've got television, I've got The Washington Post.”

Television Right Now Radio Posts Gigs

Author:Tony Kornheiser

About the Author

Born: July 13, 1948
Known for: Columnist
Quotes: 12

Books & Sources

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