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Parenting for Autism : A Comprehensive Guide for Families

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Ferdinand Jayvee Gomez

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“They say women have no conscience about laws, don't they?" Mrs. MacAvelly suggested. "Why should we?" answered her friend. "We don't make 'em—nor God—nor nature. Why on earth should we respect a set of silly rules made by some men one day and changed by some more the next?" (from According to Solomon)”

“The anthropologist Arnold van Gennep coined the expression ‘rites of passage’ after noticing the important structural analogy between ceremonies of birth, puberty, initiation, marriage and death. The ceremonies, he argued, involve three components, ordered successively: separation of the individuals or groups from their previous condition; existence on the margin (marge) during which they remain suspended in limbo, and incorporation (agrégation) as participants in their new condition. Thus the initiation into full membership is preceded by a period of alienation, as the youth is cast out from childhood and care, and forced to earn the fruits of adult freedom. Imagine, however, a situation in which the adult world is clouded over: everything pertaining to adulthood has become dark, forbidding, treacherous. The only freedom lies in youth itself. Identity must be forged by the youth from his own adolescent experience – the experience of alienation, in which the protection of the adult world has been withdrawn, and nothing put in place of it. The traditional totems, which represent the continuity and longevity of the tribe, now lose their significance. The youth must construct his own totem, his own ceremonies of initiation and membership, his own sense of togetherness, while borrowing nothing at all from the expertise and knowledge of his forefathers. His dances must be formless and violent, so that only youth can dance to them; sexual pleasure, the mark of youth, must occupy the foreground of the ritual, but sex must be meticulously divorced from marriage and the birth of children. His totems must be formed in his own image – perpetually young, perpetually transgressive, perpetually incompetent. As he dances among his kind, such a youth will be conscious of a lack. All this commotion ought to mean something; it ought to be lifting him to a higher plane. But it leaves him exactly where he was – on the margin of society, enjoying a freedom that is empty since it has no goal. He tries to lift himself with drugs, and as a result sinks further into the void. His protest resolves itself at last in a strangulated cry – a song which sounds like music only when the drumming feet of adolescents sound along with it. And if he discovers words for this song, they will probably be these: I can’t find words to say About the things caught in my mind.”

“رنگ ها نیز به حد شگفت آوری خطرناک بودند چون در ساخت آنها از سرب، آرسنیک و نوعی جیوه استفاده می شد. رنگ کاران ساختمان عموما دچار یک بیماری ناشناخته به نام قولنج نقاشان بودند که ناشی از مسمومیت سرب بود و عوارضی مانند رعشه، سرفه های شدید، خستگی و کوفتگی، افسردگی شدید، بی اشتهایی، توهم، و نابینایی داشت. یکی از علائم مسمویت از سرب این است که باعث بزرگ شدن بیش از حد شبکیه چشم قربانیان و دیدن هاله ای به وسیله ی آنان در اطراف اشیا می شود، عارضه ای که وینسنت وان گوگ از آن در نقاشی های خود استفاده کرده است. احتمالا خود اون از مسمویت سرب رنج می برد. اغلب هنرمندان مسموم می شدند. یکی از کسانی که دچار مسمویت سرب شده بود جیمز مک نیل ویستلر بود که از مقدار زیادی سرب برای خلق یک تابلوی نقاشی به اندازه ی واقعی به نام دختر سفید استفاده کرد.”

“خانه ها مخزن های پیچیده ی حیرت آوری هستند. آنچه پی بردم، در نهایت شگفتی من، این است هر چه در جهان رخ می دهد، هر چه کشف یا ساخته می شود، در نهایت به شکلی به خانه های ما راه می یابد. جنگ ها، قحطی ها، انقلاب صنعتی، عصر روشنگری، همه ی آن ها در کاناپه ها و قفسه های شما، در چین های پرده ها، در نرمی کرک های بالش شما، در رنگ های دیوارها و در آب لوله های خانه های شما وجود دارند. به این دلیل تاریخ زندگی خانواده آن طور که من کمابیش تصور کرده بودم، فقط تاریخ تخت خواب ها و کاناپه ها و اجاق های آشپزخانه نیست؛ بلکه تاریخ اسکوبرت و کود مرغ دریایی و برج ایفل و ساس و دزدیدن جسد و درباره ی هر چیز دیگری است که تاکنون رخ داده است. خانه مکانی برای فرار از تاریخ نیست؛ بلکه جایی است که تاریخ به آن جا منتهی می شود.”