Home / Quotes / Quote by J. B. Smoove

Quote by J. B. Smoove

“If your boss asks you why you're comin' in late, you say it's 'cause you stayed late.”

Quote by J. B. Smoove

Author

J. B. Smoove, born on December 16, 1965, is an American actor known for his exceptional performances in both film and television, particularly in the comedy genre. He has gained recognition for his roles in popular shows such as 'Parks and Recreation' and 'Curb Your Enthusiasm'. Smoove's comedic style is highly appreciated by audiences. more

You May Also Like

“You know how you put peanut butter on a piece of bread and the bread falls - it never falls on the bread side down, it always falls peanut butter side down. That's because of gravity.”

Knows Fall Sides Know How Pieces Bread Gravity Peanuts Peanut Butter

Author:J. B. Smoove

“I have my website, The Ruckus, which is an Internet site, similar to the Funny or Die format, where people post funny videos. I get a chance to rate their videos; they get a chance to blog and kick it with me.”

People Dies Chance Internet Rate Video Posts Kicks Site Blogs Website Format Funny Or Die Funny Videos

Author:J. B. Smoove

“You don't want to take the world over with a whole hamper full of dirty clothes. That's the main thing people overlook. And take a shower, take a bath every day.”

People World Want Whole Clothes Dirty Showers Baths Hamper Dirty Clothes

Author:J. B. Smoove

“I'm on my version of the protein diet, but there ain't no protein in it. It's a Krispy Kreme doughnut between two Cinnabons. And you soak it overnight in Red Bull. Then you chase it with a Snickers.”

Two Red Versions Diets Bulls Protein Doughnut Snickers Red Bull Krispy Kreme

Author:J. B. Smoove

“I knew I loved it because I could take the failures. I was like a professional fighter - they're beat 20 times in a row and they just want that one win.”

Want Winning Beats Fighter

Author:Pat Cooper

“When I was a boy, we had forty five statues of saints in my house. Ever have ninety eyes looking at you every time you have to go to the bathroom?”

Eye House Boys Five Saint Forty Bathroom Ninety Statues Eyes Looking

Author:Pat Cooper

“Athletes at all ages are bigger and stronger than ever before. And they are being encouraged - sometimes even incentivized, as we recently learned was the case on at least one National Football League team - to play to injure.”

Sometimes Play Age Cases Team Football Bigger Stronger Athlete League Stronger Than Ever

Author:Naveen Jain

“I say, when you tell the truth, you never offend nobody, particularly if you do it with dignity.”

Ifs Truth Dignity Telling The Truth

Author:Pat Cooper

“When my mother would make me sandwiches for school - zucchini and eggs, pepper and eggs, everything was with eggs - the oil would drip out of the bag. She didn't care if I lost the sandwich - she wanted that brown bag back. She used to give me artichoke sandwiches. You have no idea how embarrassing it is to sit in the schoolyard eating an artichoke with a piece of bread. A lot of kids didn't know what it was, they'd say, Look at that guy eating flowers!”

Ifs Knows Giving Looks Ideas Care Kids Wanted School Used Mother Guy Lost Pieces Flower Eating Give Me Oil Bread No Idea Brown Bags Eggs Embarrassing Sandwiches That Guy Peppers Artichokes Zucchini

Author:Pat Cooper

“One of my sisters wanted to be an opera singer. So, we spent a few dollars to try to train her, because Italian people would like to have an opera singer in the family. But she's got trouble coughing, let alone singing. One day, she was in the shower singing 'Madame Butterfly,' three days later the Japs attacked Pearl Harbor.”

People Trying Wanted Three Trouble One Day Singing Dollars Train Singers Italian My Sister Opera Butterfly Showers Pearls Harbors Opera Singers Coughing

Author:Pat Cooper