Home / Quotes / Quote by Mitch Hedberg

Quote by Mitch Hedberg

“I went to the park and saw this kid flying a kite. The kid was really excited. I don't know why, that's what they're supposed to do. Now if he had had a chair on the other end of that string, I would have been impressed.”

Author

Mitch Hedberg

Mitch Hedberg was an American comedian born on February 24, 1968. He was known for his unique humor style and insightful observations. Hedberg's career was brief, but he left a lasting impression in the comedy world with his witty sarcasm and humorous wisdom. more

“You know when a company wants to use letters in their phone number, but often they'll use too many letters? "Call 1-800-I-Really-Enjoy-Brand-New-Carpeting." Too many letters, man, must I dial them all? "Hello? Hold on, man, I'm only on 'Enjoy.' How did you know I was calling? You're good, I can see why they hired you!"”

Knows Men Want I Can Use Humor Funny Enjoy Numbers Company Calling Letters Phones Brands Hello Brand New Did You Know Phone Numbers

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“Yeah, I'm not into sports. If someone told me I had athlete's foot, I'd say that's not my foot!”

Ifs Humor Funny Sports Feet Yeah Athlete

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“I would not want to be a mobile home repo man. Those would be hard to sneak away - "Knock knock - Hi, would you go cut your grass and look that way for a half an hour?"”

Men Way Want Looks Hard Home Humor Would Be Funny Hours Half Cutting Grass Mobile Sneak Repo Man

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“I don't want to have my face on the cover of a Wheaties box. I wanna have my face on the cover of a Rice Krispies box. "Snap, Krackle, Mitch and Pop"!”

Want Humor Funny Faces Boxes Pops Rice Snaps Rice Krispies

Author:Mitch Hedberg

Quote by Mitch Hedberg

Author

You May Also Like