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Quote by Bill Engvall

“There's a group in California that wants to make suicide a capital offense punishable by death. That's like punishing someone for being on a hunger strike by sending them to bed with no supper.”

Quote by Bill Engvall

Author

Bill Engvall, born on July 27, 1957, is an American comedian known for his unique humor style and the 'Here's Your Sign' series, which gained widespread popularity in the mid-1990s to early 2000s. Engvall's comedy career began in nightclubs and comedy clubs, eventually transitioning to television and film. more

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“I called my wife up on the cell phone and said baby you aint gonna believe this, i go, we just hit a deer with the airplane. and there was a silence on the other end of the line followed by.. OH MY GOD.! were you on the ground? I said nope, santa was makin one last run.”

Believe Said Ends Humor Running Funny Lasts Lines Silence Wife Baby Phones My Wife Cells Airplane Santa Cell Phone Deer

Author:Bill Engvall

“Science is the key to our future, and if you don’t believe in science, then you’re holding everybody back. And it’s fine if you as an adult want to run around pretending or claiming that you don’t believe in evolution, but if we educate a generation of people who don’t believe in science, that’s a recipe for disaster. We talk about the Internet. That comes from science. Weather forecasting. That comes from science. The main idea in all of biology is evolution. To not teach it to our young people is wrong.”

People Ifs Want Believe Ideas Running Young Teach Generations Keys Fine Evolution Internet Adults Don't Believe Disaster Weather Biology Pretending Our Future Educate Recipes Forecasting

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“Hard to find anything lovelier than a tree. They grow at right angles to a tangent of the nominal sphere of the Earth.”

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“History is but the record of the public and official acts of human beings. It is our object, therefore, to humanize our history and deal with people past and present; people who ate and possibly drank; people who were born, flourished and died; not grave tragedians, posing perpetually for their photographs.”

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“America has had many other discoverers besides Columbus, but he seems to have made more satisfactory arrangements with the historians than any of the others.”

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Book:Comic History of the United States

Source: Comic History of the United States

“The Earth is not 6,000 or 10,000 years old. It's not. And if that conflicts with your beliefs, I strongly feel you should question your beliefs.”

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Author:Bill Nye

“I understand that you take the Bible, as written in English, translated many many times over the last three millennia as to be a more accurate, more reasonable assessment of the natural laws we see around us than what I and everybody in here can observe. That, to me, is unsettling.”

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“As my old professor Carl Sagan said so often, 'When you’re in love, you want to tell the world.’ And I base my beliefs on the information and the process that we call science. It fills me with joy to make discoveries every day of things I’ve never seen before. It fills me with joy to know that we can pursue these answers. It is an astonishing thing that we are — you and I are one of the ways the universe knows itself.”

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“I just want to remind us all there are billions of people in the world who are deeply religious, who get enriched by the wonderful sense of community by their religion. But these same people do not embrace the extraordinary view that the Earth is somehow only 6,000 years old.”

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“I say to the grownups, if you want to deny evolution and live in your world, that's completely inconsistent with the world we observe, that's fine. But don't make your kids do it. Because we need them. We need scientifically literate voters and taxpayers for the future. We need engineers that can build stuff and solve problems.”

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