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Are We Having Fun Yet?

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Lucy Mangan

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“This is a significant, steadily growing industry representing hundreds of billions of dollars. The popularity of pre-cooked, frozen options that are reheated and ready-to-eat in minutes is not in question. The average American eats more than seventy frozen meals annually and China’s consumption is catching up to the United States.”

“If McDonald’s was a fine dining establishment, the chain would have failed years ago because customer surveys routinely return less than fifty percent satisfaction with both the food and service. Ubiquity and familiarity are the chain’s secret sauces. McDonalds survives by operating in thousands of convenient locations. This was once the strategy for the clothing retailer, The Gap and remains important to Starbucks. McDonalds is a real estate company first and a food business second.”

“At some point during this decade, people stopped being people and became consumers. The word conjures up an image of a parasite or leech, a ravenous entity existing only to devour. No longer were people simply satisfying needs, they were actively pursuing wants and becoming professional at consuming in the process. Whether it was a big bandwagon or locust mentality, ever increasing numbers of people sought the perfect home with a swimming pool, a piano in the living room, vacations, and second cars.”

“For most, the idea of whipping up a shrimp salad roll or assembling a cheeseburger loaf remained daunting. Sourcing the ingredients, finding the time, and completing the dish successfully were barriers. So why not purchase a frozen meal comprised of three or more dishes? It was ready in minutes versus hours with no preparation and cleanup. The instructions could not be clearer or simpler. Advertisements were quick to hit upon these benefits.”

“When a product debuts, it can face opposition and may require significant promotion and explanation. Heinz EZ Squirt ketchup, Crystal Pepsi, and McDonalds’ Arch Deluxe were expected to shake up their categories. The products had huge budgets to introduce and explain different colored ketchups, clear and caffeine free cola, and a gastronomic hamburger for adults. All failed. The Arch Deluxe was a quarter pound of beef on a split-top potato flour sesame seed bun, topped with a circular piece of peppered bacon, leaf lettuce, tomato, American cheese, onions, ketchup, and Dijonnaise. In 1996, McDonald's spent over US$300 million on research, production, and marketing. Despite having the largest promotional budget to that point in fast food history, the “burger with the grownup taste”, neither compelled nor impressed.”

“The traditional TV dinner has been portrayed as a dirty secret consumed in isolation. This drove perceptions and created the pathetic stereotype that changed during the pandemic. Forced to eat at home, people tried different options and experienced the changes in quality and variety of frozen meals. The products are now viable options for the one, the few, and the many.”

“Top Shelf made bold claims asserting it was, “faster than frozen”. The company hired Dick Cavett, the well-known and trusted television personality, for a series of commercials. These dinners had no preservatives, did not require freezing or refrigeration, heated in two minutes, and could be carried to work in one’s briefcase without spoiling. Cavett earnestly sold this innovation by admitting all sounded too good to be true. To battle consumer skepticism, the company pledged twice the money back if dissatisfied. That may have sealed its fate as Top Shelf and its “faster than frozen” process quickly shut down.”