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Quote by Vernon Chalmers

“The processing, letting go and healing from an abusive / toxic relationship is an emotionally challenging detachment, especially without (proper) closure. It required a conscientious effort of personal introspection, own behaviour modification, resilience, forgiveness and acceptance to move beyond the realms of just accepting someone else's (false) sense of entitlement, lack of respect and incessant aggressive behaviour tendencies”

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Vernon Chalmers

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“The development of an incipient careseeking/caregiving system involves moving from avoidance to intra-subjectivity. This can be very anxiety-provoking. One person described it as a 'crisis of attachment '. Any past internal relating is likely to have been highly ambivalent at best. This is my face and which internal beliefs, such as being unworthy of care, which were formed in identification with the perpetrator, are challenged. The little creature [a hidden dissociated part of the self] may perceive both caregiving and careseeking as dangerous. He or she may fear being vulnerable to further abuse or exploitation and 'flinches, expecting pain again '.”

HealingAttachmentDissociative Identity DisorderTraumatizedAltersExpecting PainFear Of Attachment
Book:Attachment, Trauma and Multiplicity: Working with Dissociative Identity Disorder
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“The external therapeutic relationship remains a template for the kind of supportive companionable relating it needed internally. At the same time, this stage facilitates the role of the therapist as a consultant to the system [person with dissociative identity disorder].”

HealingTherapyDissociative Identity DisorderDissociative SystemSecure Base
Book:Attachment, Trauma and Multiplicity: Working with Dissociative Identity Disorder
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