Best Dissociative Identity Disorder Quotes

Source: The Night Child

“Changes in Relationship with others: It is especially hard to trust other people if you have been repeatedly abused, abandoned or betrayed as a child. Mistrust makes it very difficult to make friends, and to be able to distinguish between good and bad intentions in other people. Some parts do not seem to trust anyone, while other parts may be so vulnerable and needy that they do not pay attention to clues that perhaps a person is not trustworthy. Some parts like to be close to others or feel a desperate need to be close and taken care of, while other parts fear being close or actively dislike people. Some parts are afraid of being in relationships while others are afraid of being rejected or criticized. This naturally sets up major internal as well as relational conflicts.”

Fear Relationships Emotion Emotional Trust Personality Shame Guilt Memory Trauma Betrayal Survivor Ptsd Dissociative Identity Disorder Mistrust Bond Dissociative Complex Ptsd

Book:Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation: Skills Training for Patients and Therapists

Source: Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation: Skills Training for Patients and Therapists

“Alterations in regulation of affect (emotion) and impulse: Almost all people who are seriously traumatized have problems in tolerating and regulating their emotions and surges or impulses. However, those with complex PTSD and dissociative disorders tend to have more difficulties than those with PTSD because disruptions in early development have inhibited their ability to regulate themselves. The fact that you have a dissociative organization of your personality makes you highly vulnerable to rapid and unexpected changes in emotions and sudden impulses. Various parts of the personality intrude on each other either through passive influence or switching when your under stress, resulting in dysregulation. Merely having an emotion, such as anger, may evoke other parts of you to feel fear or shame, and to engage in impulsive behaviors to stop avoid the feelings.”

Source: Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation: Skills Training for Patients and Therapists

“Changes in Meaning: Finally, chronically traumatized people lose faith that good things can happen and people can be kind and trustworthy. They feel hopeless, often believing that the future will be as bad as the past, or that they will not live long enough to experience a good future. People who have a dissociative disorder may have different meanings in various dissociative parts. Some parts may be relatively balanced in their worldview, others may be despairing, believing the world to be a completely negative, dangerous place, while other parts might maintain an unrealistic optimistic outlook on life”

Source: Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation: Skills Training for Patients and Therapists

“Complex PTSD consists of of six symptom clusters, which also have been described in terms of dissociation of personality. Of course, people who receive this diagnosis often also suffer from other problems as well, and as noted earlier, diagnostic categories may overlap significantly. The symptom clusters are as follows: Alterations in Regulation of Affect ( Emotion ) and Impulses Changes in Relationship with others Somatic Symptoms Changes in Meaning Changes in the perception of Self Changes in Attention and Consciousness”

Fear Relationships Emotion Emotional Trust Personality Shame Guilt Memory Trauma Betrayal Survivor Ptsd Dissociative Identity Disorder Mistrust Bond Dissociative Complex Ptsd

Book:Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation: Skills Training for Patients and Therapists

Source: Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation: Skills Training for Patients and Therapists

“Changes in the Perception of Self: People who have been traumatized in childhood are often troubled by guilt, shame, and negative feelings about themselves, such as the belief they are unlikable, unlovable, stupid, inept, dirty, worthless, lazy, and so forth. In Complex Dissociative disorders there are typically particular parts that contain these negative feelings about the self while other parts may evaluate themselves quite differently. Alterations among parts thus may result in rather rapid and distinct changes in self perception.”

Fear Emotion Emotional Personality Shame Guilt Memory Trauma Survivor Ptsd Dissociative Identity Disorder Amnesia Dissociative Worthlessness Complex Ptsd Affect Affect Regulation Disregulated

Book:Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation: Skills Training for Patients and Therapists

Source: Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation: Skills Training for Patients and Therapists

“I had a bizarre rapport with this mirror and spent a lot of time gazing into the glass to see who was there. Sometimes it looked like me. At other times, I could see someone similar but different in the reflection. A few times, I caught the switch in mid-stare, my expression re-forming like melting rubber, the creases and features of my face softening or hardening until the mutation was complete. Jekyll to Hyde, or Hyde to Jekyll. I felt my inner core change at the same time. I would feel more confident or less confident; mature or childlike; freezing cold or sticky hot, a state that would drive Mum mad as I escaped to the bathroom where I would remain for two hours scrubbing my skin until it was raw. The change was triggered by different emotions: on hearing a particular piece of music; the sight of my father, the smell of his brand of aftershave. I would pick up a book with the certainty that I had not read it before and hear the words as I read them like an echo inside my head. Like Alice in the Lewis Carroll story, I slipped into the depths of the looking glass and couldn’t be sure if it was me standing there or an impostor, a lookalike. I felt fully awake most of the time, but sometimes while I was awake it felt as if I were dreaming. In this dream state I didn’t feel like me, the real me. I felt numb. My fingers prickled. My eyes in the mirror’s reflection were glazed like the eyes of a mannequin in a shop window, my colour, my shape, but without light or focus. These changes were described by Dr Purvis as mood swings and by Mother as floods, but I knew better. All teenagers are moody when it suits them. My Switches could take place when I was alone, transforming me from a bright sixteen-year-old doing her homework into a sobbing child curled on the bed staring at the wall. The weeping fit would pass and I would drag myself back to the mirror expecting to see a child version of myself. ‘Who are you?’ I’d ask. I could hear the words; it sounded like me but it wasn’t me. I’d watch my lips moving and say it again, ‘Who are you?”

Source: Today I'm Alice: Nine Personalities, One Tortured Mind

“If I was set an essay on Friday, I’d spend three hours on Saturday morning in the library. Was that normal? I didn’t know. What I did know was that I felt less prone to depression and more normal walking through Venice or staring out over the lake in Zurich. At home I wrestled continually with my moods. The black thing inside me gnawed like a rat at my self-esteem and self-confidence. I felt there was a happy person inside me too, who wanted to enjoy life, to be normal, but my feelings of self-loathing and the deep distrust I had towards my father wouldn’t allow that sunny person to come out. When the black thing had an iron grip on me, I couldn’t even look at my father: Did you do bad things to me when I was little? Like a line from a song stuck in your brain, the words ran through my head and never once came out of my mouth. Not that I needed to say what was in my mind. I was sure Father could read my thoughts in my moods, in the blank, dead stare of my eyes. It was hardly surprising that there was always an atmosphere of strain and awkwardness in the house, and the blame was always mine: Alice and her moods, Alice and her anorexia; Alice and her low self-esteem; Alice and her inescapable feelings of loss and emptiness.”

Source: Today I'm Alice: Nine Personalities, One Tortured Mind

“Not wanting the girls to endure the shame of a crazy mother, I spent my days acting as normal as possible. I walked through life, an actor in a Leave it to Beaver episode, determined to disguise all clues of my real condition until... well, until I could find an appropriate moment to do away with myself." [...] "Yet even as my depression spiraled into ever more precarious territory, I retained an uncanny ability to disguise my true mental condition from everyone except Tom. He was my sole source of strength and he never stopped encouraging me.”

Acting Emotion Despair Depression Mental Health Mental Illness Pretending Disguise Hopelessness Dissociative Identity Disorder Multiple Personality Disorder Daughters Depressive Mpd Suicidality Severe Depression Suicidehopeless

Book:Wholeness: My Healing Journey from Ritual Abuse

Source: Wholeness: My Healing Journey from Ritual Abuse

“It needs to be emphasized, however, that the ability of fantasy to achieve a sense of reality is not an indication that the traumatic abuses recalled by patients with multiple personality disorder are fabricated or made-up. What is important to recognize is that the fantasy elaborations that are connected with dissociated states in these patients are efforts at restitution and represent attempts at mastering traumatic experiences through the use of imaginative solutions. This paper is examining the use of fantasy as it participates in the formation of the clinical picture of multiple personality disorder and is not intending to cast doubt on its traumatic origin.”

Imagination Fantasy Dissociative Identity Disorder Multiple Personality Disorder Alter Personalities Imaginary Friend Personalities Dissociative Identities Fictives

Author:Walter C. Young

“I have no more fight left, the will to keep going has been extinguished and I am ready to throw in the towel. Nothing matters anymore, my heart is hollow and I see no hope for a better tomorrow. There's nothing that can lighten this heavy burden of despair - it is all too much, and it feels as if there is no end in sight.”

Despair Depression Mental Health Anguish Dissociative Identity Disorder Depressed Schizophrenia Akathisia Suicide Thoughts Mental Illlness

Author:Jonathan Harnisch

“Patrice had long since buried the particulars of events so painful that they caused her to resolve only to see good. With such a stance, such as dissociative split, she could walk with evil and believe it did not exist. She was Joe's perfect mate.”

Evil Abuse Dissociative Identity Disorder Dissociation Multiplicity Multiple Personality Disorder Ritual Abuse Mpd Evil Men

Book:Satan's High Priest

Source: Satan's High Priest

“Persons Are Turned against Themselves Evil also turns a person against herself so that self is used against self. The case of the woman who received a dismissal letter from her pastor comes to mind again. The psychological decompensation she suffered was successfully used by her husband to intercede with a psychiatrist of his choosing to commit her to the mental unit of a hospital for an extended involuntary stay, which further worsened her condition. Additional examples abound. Some patients report cults using induced hypnotic states to encourage a subject's dissociated hands and arms to do something hurtful to someone else. In such cases, the subject is encouraged to watch the hand that is hers but not hers (because it is dissociated from her). The end result is often extreme guilt. self-loathing, and distrust of one's self and motives.An incestuous parent may use a child's own natural bodily responses to repeated sexual stimulation to make the point that the child really "wants and enjoys“ what is being forced upon her.”

Self Evil Abuse Guilt Mental Illness Child Abuse Emotional Abuse Dissociative Identity Disorder Dissociation Child Sexual Abuse Self Loathing Ritual Abuse Hypnosis Satanic Ritual Abuse Cults Cult Abuse Perpetuation

Book:Trauma and Evil: Healing the Wounded Soul

Source: Trauma and Evil: Healing the Wounded Soul

“In my client who had confessed her “alien abduction” experience, an alter had been instructed that if she began to remember the ritual abuse she was to remember the alien abduction, so that nobody would believe her account of the ritual abuse. This program did not work with us, but you can imagine the larger consequences of such a ruse. p55”

Source: Healing the Unimaginable: Treating Ritual Abuse and Mind Control

“In cases of organized and multi-perpetrator abuse when the abuse occurs in the context of rituals and ceremonies, some elements of the experience may have been staged specifically with the intention of encouraging the disbelief of others if the victim were to report the crime. For example, someone reporting such a crime may mention that the devil was present, or that someone well-known was there, or that acts of magic were performed. These were tricks and deceptions by the abusers-often experienced by the victims after being given medication or hallucinogenic drugs - that render the account unbelievable, make the witness sound unreliable, and protect the perpetrators. (page 120, Chapter 9, Some clinical implications of believing or not believing the patient)”

Source: Forensic Aspects of Dissociative Identity Disorder

“We lose hope in an endless cycle of distress. To overcome our problems and find peace, we must realize we need a simple viewpoint shift: Focusing on the present and moving slowly. We should choose positivity, appreciate our blessings, and be satisfied regardless of hope. Once we see results, we can keep going. We believe our influential minds can handle this.”

Self Help Positive Thinking Depression Mental Health Cancer Resilience Dissociative Identity Disorder Schizophrenia Akathisia Loss Of Hope

Author:Jonathan Harnisch

“Dissociation is the common response of children to repetitive, overwhelming trauma and holds the untenable knowledge out of awareness. The losses and the emotions engendered by the assaults on soul and body cannot, however be held indefinitely. In the absence of effective restorative experiences, the reactions to trauma will find expression. As the child gets older, he will turn the rage in upon himself or act it out on others, else it all will turn into madness.”

Source: Satan's High Priest

“It is so much more threatening to have something out of hand than to believe that at any moment I can stop (I started to say "This foolishness") any time I need to. When I wrote the previous letter, I had made up my mind I would show you how I could be very composed and cool and not need to ask you to listen to me nor to explain anything to me nor need any help. By telling you that all this about the multiple personalities was not really true but just put on, I could show, or so I thought, that I did not need you. Well, it would have been easier if it were put on. But the only ruse of which I'm guilty is to have pretended for so long before coming to you that nothing was wrong. Pretending that the personalities did not exist has now caused me to lose about two days. Three weeks later Sybil reaffirmed her belief in the existence of her other selves in a letter to Miss Updyke, the school nurse of undergraduate days.”

Truth Mental Illness Denial Therapy Dependence Dissociative Identity Disorder Psychotherapy Multiple Personality Disorder Truth And Lies Pretence Multiple Personalities Denial Of Reality Sybil Ruse Not Pretending Faking Normal Not Fake

Book:Sybil: The Classic True Story of a Woman Possessed by Sixteen Personalities

Source: Sybil: The Classic True Story of a Woman Possessed by Sixteen Personalities

“Some people with DID present their narratives of sadistic abuse in a quite matter-of-fact way, without perceptible affect. This may sometimes be done as a way of protecting themselves, and the listener, from the emotional impact of their experience. We have found that people describing trauma in a flat way, without feeling, are usually those who have been more chronically abused, while those with affect still have a sense of self that can observe the tragedy of betrayal and have feelings about it. In some cases, this deadpan presentation can also be the result of cult training and brainwashing. Unfortunately, when a patient describes a traumatic experience without showing any apparent emotion, it can make the listener doubt whether the patient is telling the truth. (page 119, Chapter 9, Some clinical implications of believing or not believing the patient)”

Source: Forensic Aspects of Dissociative Identity Disorder

“After writing the letter Sybil lost almost two days. "Coming to," she stumbled across what she had written just before she had dissociated and wrote to Dr. Wilbur as follows: It's just so hard to have to feel, believe, and admit that I do not have conscious control over my selves. It is so much more threatening to have something out of hand than to believe that at any moment I can stop (I started to say "This foolishness") any time I need to. When I wrote the previous letter, I had made up my mind I would show you how I could be very composed and cool and not need to ask you to listen to me nor to explain anything to me nor need any help. By telling you that all this about the multiple personalities was not really true I could show, or so I thought, that I did not need you. Well, it would be easier if it were put on. But the only ruse of which I'm guilty is to have pretended for so long before coming to you that nothing was wrong. Pretending that the personalities did not exist has now caused me to lose about two days.”

Source: Sybil: The Classic True Story of a Woman Possessed by Sixteen Personalities

“If anything, please take solace in the fact that you are not burdened with my existence.”

Suffering Depression Anxiety Dissociative Identity Disorder Schizophrenia Suicidal Thoughts Self Loathing Akathisia Anti Psychiatry Benzodiazepine Withdrawal

Book:Glad You're Not Me

Source: Glad You're Not Me

“Akathisia's stygian abyss, where immeasurable restlessness tears the matrix of the psyche apart, is where beauty, love, and resilience find their most resolute expression. Even though Akathisia makes the body a puppet to an unseen puppeteer and the soul a vessel adrift in turbulent seas, human strength is the ability to find grace amidst chaos, cultivate love in desolate landscapes, and summon resilience in the face of despair and deterioration. Thus, amid mental and physical anguish, humanity's indomitable spirit transforms suffering into a crucible that yields a transcendent understanding of beauty, love, and the will to overcome. We become wise, compassionate, and resilient through suffering in this crucible.”

Inspirational Suffering Hope Mental Health Resilience Mental Illness Dissociative Identity Disorder Overcoming Adversity Schizophrenia Akathisia

Author:Jonathan Harnisch

“With DID, all parts are important aspects of the Self and exist for a reason, even if it is hard to understand or accept that concept early in treatment.”

Self Therapy Dissociative Identity Disorder Dissociation

Book:The Dissociative Identity Disorder Sourcebook

Source: The Dissociative Identity Disorder Sourcebook

“Pure empathy will make you dissociate.”

Empathy Dissociative Identity Disorder

Author:Et Imperatrix Noctem

“I was just thinking that I started off OK," Jo said. "There wasn't anything different or wrong with me when I was born. I wasn't inherently bad or freakish." That's right, Jo," Lynn said. "Other people—my mother and father—did things to me that made me feel all wrong about myself," Jo said, another warm wave of new, sure knowledge washing over her.”

Self Acceptance Dissociative Identity Disorder Complex Ptsd Abusive Parents Child Abuse Survivor Trauma Survivor Feeling Broken

Book:The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

Source: The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

“Janna knew - Rikki knew — and I knew, too — that becoming Dr Cameron West wouldn't make me feel a damn bit better about myself than I did about being Citizen West. Citizen West, Citizen Kane, Sugar Ray Robinson, Robinson Crusoe, Robinson miso, miso soup, black bean soup, black sticky soup, black sticky me. Yeah. Inside I was still a fetid and festering corpse covered in sticky blackness, still mired in putrid shame and scorching self-hatred. I could write an 86-page essay comparing the features of Borderline Personality Disorder with those of Dissociative Identity Disorder, but I barely knew what day it was, or even what month, never knew where the car was parked when Dusty would come out of the grocery store, couldn't look in the mirror for fear of what—or whom—I'd see. ~ Dr Cameron West describes living with DID whilst studying to be a psychologist.”

Source: First Person Plural: My Life as a Multiple

“As a therapist, I have many avenues in which to learn about DID, but I hear exactly the opposite from clients and others who are struggling to understand their own existence. When I talk to them about the need to let supportive people into their lives, I always get a variation of the same answer. "It is not safe. They won't understand." My goal here is to provide a small piece of that gigantic puzzle of understanding. If this book helps someone with DID start a conversation with a supportive friend or family member, understanding will be increased.”

Source: The Dissociative Identity Disorder Sourcebook

“Denial is our very real, personal response to our own trauma. But denial is the normative response to trauma—by everyone. Society may deny that anything bad ever happened to us. It may deny that DID exists. But that doesn't mean to say it's right. All it says is that like global warming, our histories and our stories are an "inconvenient truth".͏”

Trauma Denial Global Warming Dissociative Identity Disorder Dissociation Inconvenient Inconvenient Truth Child Abuse Survivors Associate Denial It Wasn T That Bad

Book:Living with the Reality of Dissociative Identity Disorder: Campaigning Voices

Source: Living with the Reality of Dissociative Identity Disorder: Campaigning Voices

“Fear and anxiety affect decision making in the direction of more caution and risk aversion... Traumatized individuals pay more attention to cues of threat than other experiences, and they interpret ambiguous stimuli and situations as threatening (Eyesenck, 1992), leading to more fear-driven decisions. In people with a dissociative disorder, certain parts are compelled to focus on the perception of danger. Living in trauma-time, these dissociative parts immediately perceive the present as being "just like" the past and "emergency" emotions such as fear, rage, or terror are immediately evoked, which compel impulsive decisions to engage in defensive behaviors (freeze, flight, fight, or collapse). When parts of you are triggered, more rational and grounded parts may be overwhelmed and unable to make effective decisions.”

Source: Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation: Skills Training for Patients and Therapists

“Theirs was the eternal youth of an alternating self, a youth with the constant although unfulfilled promise of growing up”

Healing Abuse Mental Health Recovery Sexual Abuse Psychiatry Dissociative Identity Disorder Dissociation Psychotherapy Amnesia Multiplicity Multiple Personalities Dissociative Amnesia Mpd Fugue

Book:Sybil: The Classic True Story of a Woman Possessed by Sixteen Personalities

Source: Sybil: The Classic True Story of a Woman Possessed by Sixteen Personalities

“Punishments include such things as flashbacks, flooding of unbearable emotions, painful body memories, flooding of memories in which the survivor perpetrated against others, self-harm, and suicide attempts.”

Source: Healing the Unimaginable: Treating Ritual Abuse and Mind Control

“A crucial goal is to promote healthy inter- and intra-personal relating based on inter-dependent rather than dominance and submission. Therapy needs to remain a cooperative rather than prescriptive endeavour.”

Healing Therapy Dissociative Identity Disorder Psychotherapist

Book:Attachment, Trauma and Multiplicity: Working with Dissociative Identity Disorder

Source: Attachment, Trauma and Multiplicity: Working with Dissociative Identity Disorder

“The development of an incipient careseeking/caregiving system involves moving from avoidance to intra-subjectivity. This can be very anxiety-provoking. One person described it as a 'crisis of attachment '. Any past internal relating is likely to have been highly ambivalent at best. This is my face and which internal beliefs, such as being unworthy of care, which were formed in identification with the perpetrator, are challenged. The little creature [a hidden dissociated part of the self] may perceive both caregiving and careseeking as dangerous. He or she may fear being vulnerable to further abuse or exploitation and 'flinches, expecting pain again '.”

Healing Attachment Dissociative Identity Disorder Traumatized Alters Expecting Pain Fear Of Attachment

Book:Attachment, Trauma and Multiplicity: Working with Dissociative Identity Disorder

Source: Attachment, Trauma and Multiplicity: Working with Dissociative Identity Disorder

“The external therapeutic relationship remains a template for the kind of supportive companionable relating it needed internally. At the same time, this stage facilitates the role of the therapist as a consultant to the system [person with dissociative identity disorder].”

Healing Therapy Dissociative Identity Disorder Dissociative System Secure Base

Book:Attachment, Trauma and Multiplicity: Working with Dissociative Identity Disorder

Source: Attachment, Trauma and Multiplicity: Working with Dissociative Identity Disorder

“All parts need to be honoured for their role in survival and re-framed as helpful before new coping strategies can be developed. The ability to internalise the relationship with the therapist as a caregiver is key to the individuals ability to provide for self-care and management.”

Healing Therapy Dissociative Identity Disorder Alter Personalities Coping Mechanisms Osdd Did Osdd Partial Did Unhelpful Coping Strategies

Book:Attachment, Trauma and Multiplicity: Working with Dissociative Identity Disorder

Source: Attachment, Trauma and Multiplicity: Working with Dissociative Identity Disorder

“You have to get safe and know how to work together with your system of selves before you can work on the memories with all the details and all the feelings. Even then it’s not just letting it all hang out. It’s a long slow process that is designed to overwhelm you as little as possible. We can discuss it in depth at a later time. Right now, your situation reminds me of a bunch of folks on a big sailboat that’s taking on water. No one knows where the life vests are, or how to put them on. Half the crew is below decks refusing to come out, and the other half is fighting with each other. Then someone says, ‘Ooh there’s a hurricane, let’s sail into that!’ Doesn’t sound likely that the ship and the crew are going to do very well there, does it? Sometimes, even if you’re not prepared, a hurricane hits, but that’s different from deliberately sailing into one. ‘The first thing is that everyone needs to work on working together, getting safe from harm to yourselves and others. I really believe, from everything you’ve all said, that you’ve all been hurt enough. You don’t need any more harm coming to any of you or your body. You don’t have to like everyone, love everyone, or even trust everyone inside. It’s just a matter of seeing how you can begin to risk to work together.”

Healing Safety Dissociative Identity Disorder Alter Personalities Co Operation Abuse Memories Processing Trauma Systems Work

Author:Richard J. Loewenstein

“I know full well how difficult the DID healing journey can be. It feels overwhelming and too huge to do, lots of days. But I promise you — you can do it. YOU can make progress, and you and your system can feel better as well.”

Healing Dissociative Identity Disorder Did System

Author:Kathy Broady

“Having DID is, for many people, a very lonely thing. If this book reaches some people whose experiences resonate with mine and gives them a sense that they aren't alone, that there is hope, then I will have achieved one of my goals. A sad fact is that people with DID spend an average of almost seven years in the mental health system before being properly diagnosed and receiving the specific help they need. During that repeatedly misdiagnosed and incorrectly treated, simply because clinicians fail to recognize the symptoms. If this book provides practicing and future clinicians certain insight into DID, then I will have accomplished another goal. Clinicians, and all others whose lives are touched by DID, need to grasp the fundamentally illusive nature of memory, because memory, or the lack of it, is an integral component of this condition. Our minds are stock pots which are continuously fed ingredients from many cooks: parents, siblings, relatives, neighbors, teachers, schoolmates, strangers, acquaintances, radio, television, movies, and books. These are the fixings of learning and memory, which are stirred with a spoon that changes form over time as it is shaped by our experiences. In this incredibly amorphous neurological stew, it is impossible for all memories to be exact. But even as we accept the complex of impressionistic nature of memory, it is equally essential to recognize that people who experience persistent and intrusive memories that disrupt their sense of well-being and ability to function, have some real basis distress, regardless of the degree of clarity or feasibility of their recollections. We must understand that those who experience abuse as children, and particularly those who experience incest, almost invariably suffer from a profound sense of guilt and shame that is not meliorated merely by unearthing memories or focusing on the content of traumatic material. It is not enough to just remember. Nor is achieving a sense of wholeness and peace necessarily accomplished by either placing blame on others or by forgiving those we perceive as having wronged us. It is achieved through understanding, acceptance, and reinvention of the self.”

Source: First Person Plural: My Life as a Multiple

“Dr. Talbon was struck by another very important thing. It all hung together. The stories Cheryl told — even though it was upsetting to think people could do stuff like that — they were not disjointed They were not repetitive in terms of "I've heard this before". It was not just she'd someone trying consciously or unconsciously to get attention. really processed them out and was done with them. She didn't come up with them again [after telling the story once and dealing with it]. Once it was done, it was done. And I think that was probably the biggest factor for me in her believability. I got no sense that she was using these stories to make herself a really interesting person to me so I'd really want to work with her, or something. Or that she was just living in this stuff like it was her life. Once she dealt with it and processed it, it was gone. We just went on to other things. 'Throughout the whole thing, emotionally Cheryl was getting her life together. Parts of her were integrating where she could say,"I have a sense that some particular alter has folded in with some basic alter", and she didn't bring it up again. She didn't say that this alter has reappeared to cause more problems. That just didn't happen. The therapist had learned from training and experience that when real integration occurs, it is permanent and the patient moves on.”

Source: Secret Weapons: How Two Sisters Were Brainwashed to Kill for Their Country

“Rikki looked over at me. “Why now?" she asked, looking back at Arly. “Why is this happening now?" "Hard to say." Arly [therapist] replied. "DID usually gets diagnosed in adulthood. Something happens that triggers the alters to come out. When Cam's father died and he came in to help his brother run the family business he was in close contact with his mother again. Maybe it was seeing Kyle around the same age when some of the abuse happened. Cam was sick for a long time and finally got better. Maybe he wasn't strong enough until now to handle this. It's probably a combination of things. But it sure looks like some of the abuse Cam experienced involved his mother. And sexual abuse by the mother is considered to he one of the most traumatic forms of abuse. In some ways it's the ultimate betrayal.”

Source: First Person Plural: My Life as a Multiple

“What better weapon than the human brain? The human brain was Mrs Twartski's and Wiezenslowski's domain. The children who were used were the castaways of the United States government, like dogs abandoned and a vet's office. Mrs. Twartski read the letter out loud, slowly and carefully enunciating every word in her thick Polish accent. The German scientists were looking for children who could learn quickly, were between ages four and twelve, and could withstand being famished without dying. Deutschland were paying dollar $50,000 per subject. Everyone in living room exactly Mrs. Twartski and all my aunts let out a huge "Ahhh". My sister's and my eyes grew wide because we had no idea what this meant or why the adults were so excited. Then my sister's eyes narrowed as if she knew something that I didn't yet, as if she had just figured something out.”

Source: The Enslaved Queen: A Memoir About Electricity and Mind Control

“Nita: I think I overdid the vulnerability stuff in this last letter. and that’s why I’m having an anxiety attack. Howard: With the vulnerability comes the possibility that you’ll be betrayed. Now that you’ve laid yourself wide open, I am the agent of this betrayal? It’s not my style. Nita: I’ve thought it wasn't other people’s style, too.”

Fear Doubt Betrayal Vulnerable Vulnerability Distrust Dissociative Identity Disorder Mistrust Psychotherapy Abusive Relationships Trust Issues Relationship Problems Therapy Session Vulnerability Attachment

Book:Becoming One: A Story of Triumph Over Dissociative Identity Disorder

Source: Becoming One: A Story of Triumph Over Dissociative Identity Disorder

“Howard: Sometimes a betrayal can be so subtle that it clouds the whole thing. Nita: It would have to be a real betrayal. Not like canceling an appointment. It would be like you’d end the relationship in the middle. Howard: Why would I call it off? Nita: I don’t know!”

Fear Relationships Betrayal Abandonment Dissociative Identity Disorder Psychotherapy Therapy Session

Author:Sarah E. Olson

“How do we find words for describing levels of betrayal and emotional, physical, sexual and spiritual torture that fragment and destroy a child or cast and case traumatic shadows over the whole of adult life? We might, as a society, slowly find it possible to accept that one in four citizens are likely to have experience some form of emotional, psychical, sexual or spiritual abuse (McQueen, Itzin, Kennedy, Sinason, & Maxted, 2008), in itself a figure unimaginable and hidden twenty years ago. However, accepting the way a hurt and hurting parent or stranger re-enacts their disturbance with a vulnerable child or children remains far easier to digest than to consider the intellectually planned, scientific, methodical, procedures of organized child-abusing perpetrators-in other words, torture.”

“DID is understood as a developmental failure by a traumatized child - younger than age 5-6 to establish a unified sense of self across states and contexts. Repeated severe traumatic experiences, primarily at the hands of caregivers, disrupt unification of self through the creation of extreme states.”

Age Dissociative Identity Disorder Childhood Abuse Dissociative Disorder Childhood Traum

Author:Frank W. Putnam

“In 1953, Allen Dulles, then director of the USA Central Intelligence Agency (CIA), named Dr Sidney Gottlieb to direct the CIA's MKULTRA programme, which included experiments conducted by psychiatrists to create amnesia, new dissociated identities, new memories, and responses to hypnotic access codes. In 1972, then-CIA director Richard Helms and Gottlieb ordered the destruction of all MKULTRA records. A clerical error spared seven boxes, containing 1738 documents, over 17,000 pages. This archive was declassified through a Freedom of Information Act Request in 1977, though the names of most people, universities, and hospitals are redacted. The CIA assigned each document a number preceded by "MORI", for "Managament of Officially Released Information", the CIA's automated electronic system at the time of document release. These documents, to be referenced throughout this chapter, are accessible on the Internet (see: abuse-of-power (dot) org/modules/content/index.php?id=31). The United States Senate held a hearing exposing the abuses of MKULTRA, entitled "Project MKULTRA, the CIA's program of research into behavioral modification" (1977).”

Source: Ritual Abuse and Mind Control: The Manipulation of Attachment Needs

“Shame plays a huge part in why you hate who you are. For me, a girl surrounded by sexual abuse, and being a girl filled with shame, was no fun. It looked like a boy had things much better, and better is what I wanted. I went to sleep dreaming and wishing when I woke up I would be a boy.”

Identity Shame Dissociative Identity Disorder Child Sexual Abuse Multiple Personality Disorder Identity Crisis Didmpd Identity Confusion

Book:Who Am I? Dissociative Identity Disorder Survivor

Source: Who Am I? Dissociative Identity Disorder Survivor

“Who am I? At this point, I have no clue.”

Identity Dissociative Identity Disorder Multiple Personality Disorder Identity Crisis Didmpd Identity Confusion

Book:Who Am I? Dissociative Identity Disorder Survivor

Source: Who Am I? Dissociative Identity Disorder Survivor

“To most of the outside world I am 'Kim Noble'. I'll answer to that name because I'm aware of the DID and also because it's easier than explaining who I really am. Most of the other personalities are still in denial, as I was for the majority of my life. They don't believe they share a body and absolutely refuse to accept they are only out' for a fraction of the day, despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary. I know how they feel, because for forty years that was me.”

Dissociative Identity Disorder Dissociative Amnesia Didmpd Identity Confusion Dissociative Denial

Book:All of Me

Source: All of Me

“There have been so many personalities formed inside my head that a return to normal and an understanding of who I really am will take years.”

Identity Dissociative Identity Disorder Multiple Personality Disorder Identity Crisis Didmpd Identity Confusion

Book:Who Am I? Dissociative Identity Disorder Survivor

Source: Who Am I? Dissociative Identity Disorder Survivor