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When Did You See Her Last?

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Lemony Snicket

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“(on the Pip and Squeak asking for a taxi tip) "How about a tip?" "Here's a tip," I said. "Next time you're at the library, check out a book about a champion of the world." "By that author with all the chocolate?" "Yes, but this one's even better It has some very good chapters in it." "That's the kind of tip we can use," Squeak said. "Pip reads to me between fares.”

“– To była niezła sztuczka – powiedziała. – Gdzie się pan nauczył tak dobrze spadać na drzewa? – Odebrałem nietypowe wykształcenie – odrzekłem. – A schodzić z drzewa pana nauczyli? – Najlepszy sposób to poczekać na kogoś z drabiną. – Na kogoś? – powtórzyła. – To znaczy konkretnie na kogo? – Nie wiem. Nie znam jej imienia.”

“Thus those who remain before the Lord fulfill a great service; they present to Christ all those who do not know him or who are far from him; in their name they keep vigil before him.”

“In many ways, the vampire was spared the gross suffering of the werewolf but that is only because they suffered in many other ways at the hands of the supernatural doctrines of religion. They, however, were connected to the hyperbolic voice crying in the wilderness.”

“Going to marry her? Impossible! You mean a part of her; he could not marry her all himself. It would be a case, not of bigamy but trigamy; there is enough of her to furnish wives for the whole parish. One man marry her! - it is monstrous! You might people a colony with her; or give an assembly with her; or perhaps take your morning's walk round her, always provided there were frequent resting places, and you were in rude health. I once was rash enough to try walking round her before breakfast, but only got half way and gave it up exhausted. Or you might read the Riot Act and disperse her; in short, you might do anything but marry her!”