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The Reluctant Bride

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Sarah Brazytis

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“Every estate has its traitors, so too matrimony. Naturally I do not mean the seducers, for of course they have not entered into this holy estate (I trust the mood this inquiry meets you in doesn’t cause you to smile at that expression); I do not mean those who have left it through divorce, for they have at least had the courage to be openly rebellious. No, I mean those who are rebels only in thought, who do not even dare let it be expressed in action, these wretched husbands who sit and sigh over the fact that love has long ago evaporated from their marriage, these husbands who, as you once said of them, sit like lunatics each in his matrimonial cell, and tug at the iron bars and fantasize about the sweetness of betrothal and the bitterness of marriage, these husbands who, as you rightly observe, are among those to congratulate, with a certain malicious glee, anyone who gets engaged. I cannot describe how despicable they appear to me, and how much unholy joy it gives me when such a husband confides in you and pours out all his sufferings, rattling off all his lies about the happy first love, and you say with a knowing look, ‘Yes, I’ll make sure not to get onto thin ice’, and he is all the more embittered that he can’t drag you with him into a common shipwreck. It is these husbands you so often refer to when you speak of a tender paterfamilias with four blessed children he would sooner see in hell.”

“At first, Old Madam Cheng was not very optimistic about Cheng Yujin’s marriage. When two calm and rational people were put together, no one would take the initiative to show emotions to the other. It was better to put a charming and innocent woman next to the Crown Prince, who surely would please him more. After all, men didn’t like women who were too smart. Like Huo Changyuan and Cheng Yumo, one was a formidable man, and the other was an innocent woman who knew nothing of the world. The man was the absolute authority, and the woman was relying wholeheartedly on the man, which was doing good for their relationship. But who would have thought that the final result would be quite different? Facts proved that smart people could live well anywhere. Two smart people put together only ended up twice as good. The so-called excellent men did not like smart and capable wives was merely a self-comfort of stupid people.”

“Ye canna mak a pudden oot o pig's meat, Ye canna big a hoose wi twa-three stays, Ye canna plant a tattie when the grund's weet, Ye canna ploo the hillside wi yer taes, And is it like, my love to be Thoo'll kin to mak a wife o me? The whitemae's filings arena done in wan nest, The minnow's aten by the eel alive, When cat and dog lie doon there's poor rest, The wild bee maks a fight within the hive, And is it like, my love, to be I'll can mak a wife to thee?”

“In my mind, then, I began to question myself and answer myself. I wanted clarity, I wanted sight, but it seems to me that I did not try to think the thoughts I thought. I did not foresee the thoughts I was going to think. “Do you mean that you love Mattie Chatham enough to say what you just said?” “Yes. Oh, yes! I do.” “You love her enough to be a faithful husband to her? Think what you’re saying, now. You’re proposing to be the faithful husband of a woman who is already married to an unfaithful husband?” “Yes. That’s why. If she has an unfaithful husband, then she needs a faithful one.” “A woman already married who must never know that you are her husband? Think. And who will never be your wife?” “Yes.” “Have you foreseen how this may end? Can you?” “No.” “Are you ready for this? Think, now.” “Yes. I am ready.” “Do you, then, in love’s mystery and fear, give yourself to this woman to be her faithful husband from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death?” “I do. Yes! That is my vow.”

“.. आप इतनी पढ़ाई-लखाई केवल इसलिए कर रही हैं कि आपको अच्छा पति मिल सके? अपना और अपनी पढ़ाई की इज़्ज़त न करिये कोई बात नहीं लेकिन इतनी बेइज़ती भी न करिये।”

“In the modern culture, much emphasis has been placed on the "culture of the fiesh" and the eternal and spiritual nature of man has been mininized. Self-indulgence has become the primary value and is protected by our modern society under the pretext of individual "civil rights." Personal gratification and fulfilment in this world has supplanted the spiritual striving for purity and holiness, which is the true source of joy. The love of God has been replaced by love of self. The desire for eternal bliss has been replaced by the desire for worldly bliss. The fear of eternal punishment has been replaced by the fear of worldly discomfort and condemnation. Man has supplanted God as the measure of all things.”