“The Power of a Positive No describes how to say No when it is vital to stand up and protect your core interests and values. It is not just about how to say No, however, but about how to do so in a respectful and constructive manner that can potentially lead to agreement. As its subtitle indicates, it is about how to say No and still get to Yes.”
Source: Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations
“If you persist over time, refusing to take offense, making your motive genuine, showing respect, and constantly searching for Mutual Purpose, then the other person will almost always join you in dialogue.”
Source: Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High
“You need confidence to stand up for yourself in the face of the other’s reaction. You need power to be able to follow through on your No if the other refuses to respect it.”
Source: The Power of a Positive No: How to Say No and Still Get to Yes
“If you are refusing an alcoholic drink, for instance, you don’t need to justify your refusal. A simple respectful “No thanks” will do. You know your Yes—that is essential—but sometimes you keep it to yourself, because it is your business and not theirs.”
Source: The Power of a Positive No: How to Say No and Still Get to Yes
“If the other refuses to respect your No, you may see only two choices: submission and outright war. Yet there is a third choice, highlighted by Gandhi: to underscore your Positive No. Don’t overreact, underscore. To underscore means to emphasize patiently and persistently that No in fact means No. It means continuing to stand up for what is important to you without destroying the possibility of a deal or a healthy relationship.”
Source: The Power of a Positive No: How to Say No and Still Get to Yes
“By refusing to respect you and your needs, the other is bringing about a certain set of natural consequences, which themselves can become the other’s teacher. Your job is to simply facilitate the learning process, beginning by asking reality-testing questions, and proceeding to warnings.”
Source: The Power of a Positive No: How to Say No and Still Get to Yes
“As Gandhi recognized and demonstrated, perhaps the chief positive power we have in a world of relationships is the ability to withdraw our cooperation if the other refuses to respect our legitimate interests.”
Source: The Power of a Positive No: How to Say No and Still Get to Yes
“Character No Commodity (The Sonnet)
Character, I say, is no commodity,
To be traded in for luxury.
Integrity, I say, is no commodity,
To be traded in for security,
Virtues, I say, are no commodity,
To be traded in for applause.
Values, I say, are no commodity,
To be traded in for comfort.
Warmth, I say, is no commodity,
To be traded in for image.
Humility, I say, is no commodity,
To be traded in for respect.
A life without honor, I say,
Is a life totally gone astray.”
Source: Mücadele Muhabbet: Gospel of An Unarmed Soldier
“The true self is already whole, complete, and perfect—it simply needs to be acknowledged and embraced.”
Source: ENERGY OF THE SOUL: A JOURNEY FROM NOTHING TO BOUNDLESS HEALING
“We should show respect for other people even before they have done anything to deserve it, simply because they are human beings. Respect reminds people of their innate and extraordinary value even if they have forgotten it themselves. At the same time, we should always expect to have to earn the respect of others. I have often heard people speak of their encounters with great leaders such as Mother Teresa and Gandhi, and almost to a person they say the same thing, “I felt that for those moments there was nothing else in the world but the two of us and our conversation. People were trying to pull at us, and there was a schedule to be keep, but she gazed into my eyes as if she didn’t have a care in the world, as if nothing other than me existed.” Who doesn’t like to be treated in that way? How do such people do it? The outer action of respect is born from the inner quality of reverence, and that reverence is the fruit of reflection, which helps us to see people and things in their true value.”
Source: The Seven Levels of Intimacy: The Art of Loving and the Joy of Being Loved