“The thing that experts agree on is that although divorce is difficult and stressful for kids no matter what, the real harm to kids comes from being subjected to conflict between parents. The longer that lasts, and the more severe it is, the worse it is for your children. If you truly want to shield your children from the pain of divorce, recognize that the more you take the high road with your spouse, the better job you'll do.” IfsWantChildrenRealMatterKidsPainJobsLastsParentDifficultConflictOur ChildrenNo Matter WhatAgreeDivorceHarmYour ChildrenExpertsSevereSpouseShieldsStressfulBetter JobsHigh RoadTaking The High Road Author:Emily Doskow
“Often, when there is a conflict between parent and child, at its very hub is an expectation that the child should be acting differently. Sometimes these expectations run counter what is known about children's growth. They stem from remembering oneself, but usually at a slightly older age.” ShouldChildrenSometimesRunningAgeRememberParentGrowthActingKnownConflictExpectationsOneselfStemChildren And ParentsHub Book:The Six Stages of Parenthood Source: The Six Stages of Parenthood
“Children in home-school conflict situations often receive a double message from their parents: "The school is the hope for your future, listen, be good and learn" and "the school is your enemy. . . ." Children who receive the "school is the enemy" message often go after the enemy--act up, undermine the teacher, undermine the school program, or otherwise exercise their veto power.” ChildrenHomeSchoolParentSituationEnemyTeacherExerciseConflictMessagesProgramBe GoodMy ChildrenOur FutureYour FutureVeto Author:James P. Comer
“They [parents] can help the children work out schedules for homework, play, and television that minimize the conflicts involved inwhat to do first. They can offer moral support and encouragement to persist, to try again, to struggle for understanding and mastery. And they can share a child's pleasure in mastery and accomplishment. But they must not do the job for the children.” TryingFirstsChildrenPlayHelpingJobsParentUnderstandingPleasureMoralSupportStruggleShareTelevisionInvolvedOffersConflictEncouragementWork OutAccomplishmentMasteryPersistSchedulesHomeworkTry AgainSupport And EncouragementMoral Support Author:Dorothy H Cohen
“[17th-century] Puritans were the first modern parents. Like many of us, they looked on their treatment of children as a test of their own self-control. Their goal was not to simply to ensure the child's duty to the family, but to help him or her make personal, individual commitments. They were the first authors to state that children must obey God rather than parents, in case of a clear conflict.” FirstsChildrenSelfStatesHelpingIndividualParentGoalCasesClearModernCenturyDutyConflictCommitmentTestsTreatmentSelf ControlPuritan17th Century Author:C. Sommerville
“The vast majority of things parents and kids get in conflict over are highly predictable. We're disagreeing about the same expectations the kid is having difficulty meeting every hour, every day, every week. Because it's predictable, we can have these conversations proactively. That is very hard for people.” PeopleHardKidsParentHoursWeekConversationConflictExpectationsDifficultyMajorityMeetingsPredictable Author:Ross W. Greene
“Key relationships can become threatened when you start exploring your own path. This is true when it comes to relationships with parents, mentors, and bosses. It's not always true, but many times these important people in our lives feel threatened in some way by our independence from them. There is an inner conflict that comes with exploring your own voice.” PeopleImportantParentPathConflictIndependenceBossMentorExploringPeople In Our Lives Author:Chip Espinoza
“When parents are educated about how not to involve children in their conflicts and co-parent amicably, a lot of the ill effects of divorce can be alleviated. Divorce is always painful. But kids in a high-conflict marriage or low-conflict but contemptuous ones are often better off in the long run when the parent can disengage.” ChildrenLongRunningKidsParentConflictIllPainfulDivorceEducated Author:Stephanie Coontz
“There are new studies showing that young men and men with more progressive views of what a father should be - which is not just a helper and fun parent, but actually a partner - are beginning to feel more work-life conflict than mothers are. They're trying to do what women have been doing for 30 years, and they're having a very stressful time of it - a harder time at work because we still expect men to be on 24-7, working 40 years straight.” MenTryingMotherFatherFunParentStudyConflictProgressiveStressful Author:Brigid Schulte
“Two children of same cruel parent look at one another and see in each other the image of the cruel parent or the image of their past oppressor. This is very much the case between Jew and Arab: It's a conflict between two victims.” LooksChildrenTwoPastParentCasesConflictVictimJewOppressors Author:Amos Oz