“I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family.” PeopleCountryStatesWholeHumorFunnyAmericaSidesComedyPercentFolksTraveled Author:Jeff Foxworthy
“I am just an old country boy in a big town trying to get along. I have been eating pretty regular and the reason I have been is because I have stayed an old country boy.” TryingHas BeensCountryReasonHumorBigsFunnyBoysEatingTownsAgricultureCountry Boy Book:Will Rogers' Weekly Articles: The Harding Source: Will Rogers' Weekly Articles: The Harding
“During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet. I took the initiative in moving forward a whole range of initiatives that have proven to be important to our country's economic growth and environmental protection, improvements in our educational system.” ImportantCountryStatesWholeFunnyMovingGrowthUnitedUnited StatesEconomicInternetCreatingEnvironmentalCongressEducationalProtectionImprovementMoving ForwardOur CountryRangeInitiativeProvenEconomic GrowthGoreEducational SystemEnvironmental Protection Author:Al Gore
“I think the scores for Olympic gymnastics are affected by what countries the judge and the gymnast are from. That's wrong. That type of political pandering isn't meant for gymnastic Olympic events. It's meant for the Supreme Court.” ThinkingCountryFunnyPoliticalEventsJudgingTypeCourtSupremeScoreAffectedOlympicsSupreme CourtGymnasticsGymnastLondon Olympics Author:Craig Ferguson
“The U.S. team has swept all the medals in the skeet shooting event. So despite our bad economy, it's nice to know our country has never been safer from an attack of skeets.” KnowsCountryFunnyEconomyNiceTeamEventsDespiteOur CountryShootingOlympicsMedalLondon Olympics Author:Conan O'Brien
“The European countries are really hoping to do well in the Olympics. If they win gold medals, they can use them as cash.” IfsWellsCountryUseFunnyWinningGoldCashOlympicsMedalGold MedalsEuropean CountriesLondon Olympics Author:David Letterman
“Mitt Romney will travel to London where he will attend the Olympics opening ceremony. Of course it's going ot be weird when they're announcing all the countries, and he's like 'Got a bank account there, got one there, two bank accounts there.'” TwoCountryFunnyCoursesAccountsLondonOpeningOlympicsCeremonyRomneyBank AccountsAnnouncingLondon OlympicsOpening Ceremony Author:Jimmy Fallon