“It is tempting to think of your husband-to-be as just another bridal accessory. It may be easier for him to play along with this too. After all, you don't expect your shoes or your beaded bag to help you make decisions.” ThinkingMayPlayHelpingDecisionEasierHusbandShoesBagsThink Of YouAccessoriesTemptingYour HusbandBridalHusband To Be Author:Mimi Pond
“I'm a double bagger. Not only does my husband put a bag over my face when we're making love, but he also puts a bag over his head in case mine falls off.” DoeFacesFallCasesMinesHusbandBagsMy HusbandMaking LoveBunkBagger Author:Joan Rivers
“I caused my husband's heart attack. In the middle of lovemaking I took the paper bag off my head. He dropped the Polaroid and keeled over and so did the hooker. It would have taken me half an hour to untie myself and call the paramedics, but fortunately the Great Dane could dial.” HeartHoursHalfTakenMiddleHusbandPaperBagsMy HusbandHeart AttackPaper BagsPolaroidsParamedics Author:Joan Rivers
“Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer. I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds. I'm a double bagger. Not only does my husband put a bag over my face when we're making love, but he also puts a bag over his head in case mine falls off. It's so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom. My best birth control now is to leave the lights on.” MenYearsLongDoeLightPainFacesMotherFallThreeSexPoorCasesMinesHe ManGoes OnBirthBedHusbandBlameForgottenTiesBagsMy HusbandThree YearsKillersMaking LoveBirth ControlBunkLove My HusbandBaggerBunk Beds Author:Joan Rivers
“In my third husband I had discovered a blissfully laid-back type who thought it nothing less than hilarious when I misread the map on the way to Wales, so it took us an extra three hours, or when I was sick in a plastic carrier bag during much of the drive back from Devon - a bag that turned out to have a hole in it.” WayThreeHoursTypeHusbandThirdsSickHolesExtrasBagsMapsPlasticWalesCarrierLaid BackDevon Author:Julie Burchill
“Mom put dense cheddar bread into a bag for a man who said this was his wife's favorite - he'd driven all the way from New Jersey to buy it because today was their anniversary. Several women in the store jabbed their husbands on hearing this. I hung my head - Peter Terris wouldn't cross the street to buy me a Twinkie.” MenWaySaidTodayWifeStreetsMomHusbandCrossesHearingDrivenStoresBreadBagsPeterHungJerseyNew JerseyDenseCheddar Book:Thwonk Source: Thwonk