“Making amends is not only saying the words but also being willing to listen to how your behavior caused another’s pain, and then the really hard part…changing behavior.” LoveFamilyForgivenessChaosRecoveryDysfunctional FamiliesAmendsDysfunctionalChnage4th Step5th Step Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“Children have empty erasable white boards upon which big people write indelibly imprinted messages into their tender subconscious minds.” LoveChangeChaosRecoveryMaturityFamiliesDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctionalChildren Parenting Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“Shame is a powerful feeling. There is a tremendous difference between making a mistake and believing you are a mistake...If I don’t see myself as being a mistake then it is I who must take responsibility and I am not ready to accept that.” LoveResponsibilityFamilyShameChaosRecoveryDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“Wounded parents often unintentionally inflict pain and suffering on their children and these childhood wounds causes a laundry list of maladaptive behaviors commonly called codependency. These habits restrict people to love-limiting relationships causing much unhappiness and distress.” LovePainParentingChaosRecoveryDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctionalChildhood WoundsSuffering Children Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“Mature adults gravitate toward new values and understandings, not just rehashing and blind acceptance of past patterns and previous learning. This is an ongoing process and maturity demands lifelong learners.” LoveChildrenUnderstandingChangeFamilyChaosMaturityFamiliesDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“If we want to improve, first we have to recognize our own maladaptive coping skills, called codependency, then change.” LoveRelationshipsChangeFamilyChaosCodependencyDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctionalCo Dependence Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“If you are looking for love under rocks or bringing home water moccasins, you might be confusing love and pain.” LovePainRelationshipsChangeFamilyRecoveryDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“With improved coping skills forged through my midlife crisis, I now listen first and do not control, and I allow these now adult children to come to their own conclusions about what they want for their lives.” LoveChangeChaosDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctionalCoping SkillsMaturity Parenting Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“As a parent who raised his children in dysfunction, I know the parental wounds my children received were not intentional; often they were my best expression of love, sometimes coming out sideways, not as I intended.” LoveChangeFamilyParentingChaosFamiliesDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctionalParental AbuseChildhood WoundsChaso Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“Sitting on the hot seat of change requires much courage, patience, and persistence.” LoveChangeFamilyChaosRecoveryHabitsDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“The strange part about a person’s lack of trust is that it often comes from not trusting themselves.” LoveChangeTrustChaosRecoveryDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“The key problem I encounter working with wounded, depressed, and unhappy people is a lack of connection…starting from a disconnection from themselves and then with others. This is why love often becomes so distorted and destructive. When people experience a disconnection from themselves, they feel it but do not realize the problem.” LoveJoyChangeShameUnhappyRecoveryDepressedFamiliesDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctionalDisconnectionChnageShame Recovery Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“Consider letting go of the barriers between yourself and others, let go of the definition our culture has inflicted upon us and allow the best part of ourselves to connect with the wondrous parts of others. Allow yourself to connect in a deeper and more profound way.” LoveChangeShameRecoveryConnectionBarriersFamiliesWallsDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“You did not invent these family habits. Your family is like mine, for thousands and thousands of years our families have embraced a dysfunctional lifestyle, passing these habits as gospel on to subsequent generations. This was not done out of malice, spite, or hate, but what they knew best. As ineffective as these habits are, you never stopped to consider another way of loving.” LoveJoyShameRecoveryFamiliesDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctionalAcceptence Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“No one escapes some degree of chaos for it is so ever prevalent; it is the human experience. This realization does not mean we can’t improve. It does mean we can accept our state of chaos, lighten up on ourselves, have fun, and work on improving…we are a work in progress. Enjoy the journey.” LoveJoyChangeProgressShameChaosRecoveryJourney Of LifeFamiliesDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“Many of the habits of dysfunctional families use are not from the lack of love but are the result of fear. Knowing the love-limiting habits and behaviors of dysfunctional families is a wonderful beginning to lower the fear, allowing us to be real, allowing us all to learn how to love better.” LoveJoyFearChangeShameRecoveryHabitsDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“What are humans meant to do; why are we here? Are we a mutation on the earth destroying its host? Are we a cancer destined to kill what supports us? I think not. So exploring this question is a powerful exercise in meaning; what is the meaning of human existence?” LoveChangeShameRecoveryMeaningIntrospectionFamiliesDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“Honoring your word is the fiber from which trust is built.” LoveTrustChaosRecoveryFamiliesDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctionalSelf Esteem Honor Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“When you journey inwardly exploring yourself, a sense of personal trust begins.” LoveChangeFamilySelf EsteemTrustChaosFamiliesDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“It is very difficult to develop a proper sense of self-esteem in a dysfunctional family. Having very little self-worth, looking at one’s own character defects becomes so overwhelming there is no room for inward focus. People so afflicted think: “I need to keep you from knowing me. I have already rejected me, but if you knew how flawed I am, you would also reject me…and since this is all I have, I could not stand any more rejection. I am not worthy of someone understanding me so you will not get the chance...so I must judge, reject, attack, and/or find fault with you. I don’t accept me so how can I accept you?” LoveSelf EsteemSelf HelpLove HurtsDysfunctionDysfunctional FamiliesAcceptenceDysfunctional Relationship Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“Since children from dysfunctional families are so good at judging others, they also judge themselves finding themselves unacceptable when compared to others, always assuming they are second best, not enough. This is a painful realization so often they hide behind righteous arrogance.” LoveChaosJudgementArroganceDysfunctional FamiliesAcceptenceDysfuctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“Our parents were our first gods. If parents are loving, nurturing, and kind, this becomes the child’s definition of the creator. If parents were controlling, angry, and manipulative, then this becomes their definition.” LoveSpiritualityChangeHurtChaosSpiritual GrowthSpiritual WisdomGodsFamiliesDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctional Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
“The greater the pain associated with love, the more likely a person is to be attracted to others who will inflict this pain…for isn’t this what love is? Hurt people tend to hurt other people.” LovePainRelationshipsHurtFamilyAttractionRelationship AdviceFamiliesDysfunctional FamiliesDysfunctionalChange Recovery Author:David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough