“The party of Lincoln and Liberty was transmogrified into the party of hairy-backed swamp developers and corporate shills, faith-based economists, fundamentalist bullies with Bibles, Christians of convenience, freelance racists, misanthropic frat boys, shrieking midgets of AM radio, tax cheats, nihilists in golf pants, brownshirts in pinstripes, sweatshop tycoons. ... Republicans: The No. 1 reason the rest of the world thinks we're deaf, dumb, and dangerous.” ThinkingWorldReasonChristianPoliticalPartyLibertyBoysDangerousRepublicanTaxesGolfRadioDumbCorporateRacistPantsCheatEconomistBullyDeafConvenienceFundamentalistSwampsDevelopersFaith BasedMidgetNihilistMisanthropicSweatshopsTycoonsShills Author:Garrison Keillor
“We writers don't really think about whether what we write is good or not. It's too much to worry about. We just put the words down, trying to get them right, operating by some inner sense of pitch and proportion, and from time to time, we stick the stuff in an envelope and ship it to an editor.” ThinkingWritingTryingStuffWorryToo MuchSticksShipsProportionEditorsEnvelopes Author:Garrison Keillor
“The socially redeeming aspect of golf lies in the vast number of lawyers and bankers and managers who play it, and when you think of the damage they would do if they were at the job instead, you can see why golf courses are a wise investment for any municipality.” IfsThinkingPlayJobsLyingCoursesNumbersWiseAspectGolfInvestmentLawyerManagersDamageBankersGolf CourseRedeemingMunicipality Author:Garrison Keillor
“I think there's a lot of power in listening to one person talking to you. And this should never be underestimated.One person sitting and talking to you and, you're pulled in, in ways that technology and art and all cannot.” ThinkingWayShouldPersonsArtTalkingTechnologyListeningSittingUnderestimated Author:Garrison Keillor
“A good friend is a person who thinks you're one of the good eggs, even if he knows you're a little cracked.” IfsThinkingKnowsLittlesPersonsEggsGood FriendCracked Author:Garrison Keillor
“I think that if writers are tempted to do other things, they ought to go do other things. They should not write if they don't feel like it. I say this as a competitor. I am not interested in encouraging people who are in competition with me.” PeopleIfsThinkingFeelsShouldWritingOughtCompetitionNot InterestedCompetitorsTempted Author:Garrison Keillor
“I think that you are only obliged to be a humorist from the age of 18 until you turn 30. Past the age of 30 I don't think there is any obligation to be clever at all.” ThinkingAgePastTurnsCleverObligationObligedHumorists Author:Garrison Keillor
“A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table - There's nothing wrong with them, but it's hard to stop thinking about it.” ThinkingHardGirlTablesCoffeeLoadedPistolsBikinisLoaded GunLake Wobegon Author:Garrison Keillor
“I'm not busy... a woman with three children under the age of 10 wouldn't think my schedule looked so busy.” ThinkingChildrenAgeThreeBusySchedulesBusy Life Author:Garrison Keillor
“Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.” ThinkingHumorChristianFunnyReligionChurchReligiousCarSittingGarageFunny Religious Author:Garrison Keillor
“One reads books in order to gain the privilege of living more than one life. People who don't read are trapped in a mine shaft, even if they think the sun is shining.” PeopleIfsThinkingBookOrderSunMinesGainsShiningPrivilegeTrappedLiving More Author:Garrison Keillor
“Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. ~Garrison Keillor” ThinkingWantMindImportantBeautifulBeautyDollarsFiftyCentsWhat's ImportantHaircutsBeing BeautifulBeautiful YouYour BeautifulPretty FaceHealth BeautyLake Wobegon Author:Garrison Keillor
“I think the most un-American thing you can say is, 'You can't say that.'” ThinkingAmericaHistory Author:Garrison Keillor
“Some people think it is difficult to be a Christian and to laugh, but I think it's the other way around. God writes a lot of comedy, its just that he has so many bad actors.” PeopleThinkingWayWritingChristianActorsDifficultLaughingComedyTheologian Author:Garrison Keillor
“We have nearly complete misunderstanding between people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon, and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well. It's when you are trying to convince another person to think the same way that you do that there is friction and trouble between people. But when you feel that the other person is dumber than dirt, too dumb for words - why waste your breath - you get along pretty well. There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.” PeopleThinkingWayFeelsTryingWellsPersonsDifferentReasonStrongTroubleWasteBreathsSuperiorsDumbReason WhyLakesConvinceDirtMisunderstandingFrictionTrying HardDifferent FaithsLake Wobegon Author:Garrison Keillor
“English is the perfect language for preachers because it allows you to talk until you think of what to say.” ThinkingLanguagePerfectPreacher Author:Garrison Keillor
“I think if the church put in half the time on covetousness that it does on lust, this would be a better world for all of us.” IfsThinkingWorldDoeWould BeChurchHalfLustCovetousness Book:Lake Wobegon Days Source: Lake Wobegon Days
