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John Gray

John Gray Quotes

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Famous John Gray Quotes

“To summarize the two most common mistakes we make in relationships: 1. A man tries to change a woman's feelings when she is upset by becoming Mr. Fix-It and offering solutions to her problems that invalidate her feelings. 2. A woman tries to change a man's behavior when he makes mistakes by becoming the home-improvement committee and offering unsolicited advice or criticism.”

MenWomenRelationships
Book:Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus
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“As a man experiences limits, he is motivated to give more. Through respecting limits, he automatically is motivated to question the effectiveness of his behavior patterns and to start making changes. When a woman realizes that in order to receive she needs to set limits, then automatically she begins to forgive her partner and explore new ways of asking for and receiving support. When a woman sets limits, she gradually learns to relax and receive more.”

MenWomenRelationships
Book:Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus
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“Freud taught that for any human being kindness or cruelty, having a sense of justice or lacking it, depend on the accidents of childhood. We all know this to be true, but it goes against much of what we say we believe. We cannot give up the pretence that being good is something anyone can achieve. If we did, we would have to admit that, like beauty and intelligence, goodness is a gift of fortune. We would have to accept that, in the parts of our lives where we are most attached to it, free­dom of the will is an illusion. We would have to own up to what we all deny—that being good is good luck. By making us face this awkward truth, Freud wounded the concept of 'morality' more deeply than did Nietzsche.”

GoodnessFreud
Book:Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals
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“It seems feasible that over the coming century human nature will be scientifically remodelled. If so, it will be done haphaz­ardly, as an upshot of struggles in the murky realm where big business, organised crime, and the hidden parts of govern­ment vie for control. If the human species is re-engineered it will not be the result of humanity assuming a godlike control of its destiny. It will be another twist in man's fate.”

Human Nature
Book:Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals
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“Martians are more solution oriented. If something is working, their motto is don't change it. Their instinct is to leave it alone if it is working. "Don't fix it unless it is broken" is a common expression. When a woman tries to improve a man, he feels she is trying to fix him. He receives the message that he is broken. She doesn't realize her caring attempts to help him may humiliate him. She mistakenly thinks she is just helping him grow.”

MenRelationships
Book:Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus
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“At such times he withdraws from relationships or intimacy and remains stuck in his cave. He asks himself what it is all for, and why he should bother. He doesn't know that he has stopped caring because he doesn't feel needed. he does not realize that by finding someone who needs him, he can shake off his depression and be motivated again. Not to be needed is a slow death for a man. When a man doesn't feel he is making a positive difference in someone else's life, it is hard for him to continue caring about his life and relationships. It is difficult to be motivated when he is not needed. To become motivated again he needs to feel appreciated, trusted, and accepted. Not to be needed is a slow death for a man.”

MenRelationships
Book:Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus
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“Just as women are sensitive to feeling rejected when they don't get the attention they need, men are sensitive to feeling that they have failed when a woman talks about problems. This is why it is so hard for him to listen sometimes. He wants to be her hero. When she is disappointed or unhappy over anything, he feels like a failure. Her unhappiness confirms his deepest fear: he is just not good enough. Many women today don't realize how vulnerable men are and how much they need love too. Love helps him to know that he is enough to fulfill others.”

MenRelationships
Book:Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus
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“Tragedy is born of myth, not morality. Prometheus and Icarus are tragic heroes. Yet none of the myths in which they appear has anything to do with moral dilemmas. Nor have the greatest Greek tragedies. If Euripides is the most tragic of the Greek playwrights, it is not because he deals with moral conflicts but because he understood that reason cannot be the guide of life.”

MoralityTragedyGreek MythologySocratesEuripidesThe Death Of Tragedy
Book:Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals
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“The mass of mankind is ruled not by its intermittent moral sensations, still less by self-interest, but by the needs of the moment. It seems fated to wreck the balance of life on Earth—and thereby to be the agent of its own destruc­tion. What could be more hopeless than placing the Earth in the charge of this exceptionally destructive species? It is not of becoming the planet's wise stewards that Earth­ lovers dream, but of a time when humans have ceased to matter.”

Mankind
Book:Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals
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“Perché non mi ascolti quando parlo?è un manuale per le relazioni affettive degli anni Novanta. Rivela come uomini e donne siano diversi in ogni aspetto della vita. Non solo i due sessi comunicano in modo diverso, ma pensano, sentono, percepiscono, reagiscono, amano, provano bisogno e giudicano secondo diverse modalità. Sembra quasi che provengano da pianeti diversi, perché parlano lingue diverse e diverse sono le loro necessità. Gli uomini vengono da Marte, le donne da Venere”

AmorePsicologiaItalianoSessoVita Di CoppiaUomini E Donne
Book:Gli uomini vengono da Marte, le donne da Venere: Istruzioni per l'uso
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“Ogni giorno milioni di individui sono alla ricerca di un compagno con cui dividere l'esperienza di un sentimento speciale. Ogni anno milioni di coppie si uniscono per amore e finiscono poi col separarsi quando l'amore finisce. Tra le coppie che sono state capaci di mantenere vivo l'amore fino al matrimonio, solo il cinquanta per cento rimane unito. Di queste è probabile che un altro cinquanta per cento non abbia trovato nella vita in comune tutta la soddisfazione prevista. Si resta insieme per lealtà e senso del dovere, oppure per il timore di dover ricominciare tutto da capo.”

AmorePsicologiaItalianoVita Di CoppiaRelazioni Di CoppiaUomini E Donne
Book:Gli uomini vengono da Marte, le donne da Venere: Istruzioni per l'uso
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