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Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men

Book by Lundy Bancroft · 6 quotes · Abuse, Partners, Abusers

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Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men Quotes

“An abuser can seem emotionally needy. You can get caught in a trap of catering to him, trying to fill a bottomless pit. But he's not so much needy as entitled, so no matter how much you give him, it will never be enough. He will just keep coming up with more demands because he believes his needs are your responsibility, until you feel drained down to nothing.”

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Book:Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
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“It is not possible to be truly balanced in one's views of an abuser and an abused woman. As Dr. Judith Herman explains eloquently in her masterwork Trauma and Recovery, “neutrality” actually serves the interests of the perpetrator much more than those of the victim and so is not neutral. Although an abuser prefers to have you wholeheartedly on his side, he will settle contentedly for your decision to take a middle stance. To him, that means you see the couple's problems as partly her fault and partly his fault, which means it isn't abuse.”

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Book:Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
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