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Matthew Bracey Biography

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“I don’t need to learn about computers and the internet. My sperm does it for me”

Life Philosophy Unreal Pointing Fingers Spoken Head In The Clouds

Book:Steel Dogs

Source: Steel Dogs

“It was mostly just the concept of eating a cock that Matthew found so challenging, irrespective of which animal it came from.”

Humour Disgusting Challenge Concept Eating Habits Cock Mostly Harmless Irrespective

Book:Steel Dogs

Source: Steel Dogs

“Christ, did life get any worse than this? He pushed the head of the cock past his terrified, quivering lips and attempted to bite into the thing.”

Terrified Bad Luck Push Yourself Cock Disgusting Food

Book:Steel Dogs

Source: Steel Dogs

“If Brian Harvey from East 17 has lived there, it can’t be that fucking bad”

Point Of View Quote About Life Uninspirational Fucking Funny Lived Quotes

Book:Steel Dogs

Source: Steel Dogs

“While he was still dreading having to eat the bastard, he was grateful that he wouldn’t be the first one to have to tear a strip of brain from its head”

Brain Gross Eating Animals Dreadful Sickening About To Break Preparing Yourself

Book:Steel Dogs

Source: Steel Dogs

“when things are going too well, don’t be foolish enough to trust that it’ll continue that way, because some shit will inevitably go down very soon and BOOM, there it is, The Fuckening!”

Trust Quotes Foolish Quotes Negative Beliefs Saying Of The Prophet Old Age Saying

Book:Steel Dogs

Source: Steel Dogs

“It didn’t take him thirty seconds to have a swig of vodka and a hefty sniff before his hands were as steady as a bloke with his bollocks caught in a zip”

Funny Quotes Funny Quote Hilarious Quotes Funny As Hell

Book:Steel Dogs

Source: Steel Dogs

“I feel a bit like the Willy Wonka of Neon, if you could eat neon, chocolate would be the next best thing”

Quote Self Confidence Eat Neon Happy Quotes Made Me Think Best Things In Life Crazy Quotes Chocolate Lovers Wonka

Author:Matthew Bracey

“He had the gift of the gab and could sell sand to Arabs. Hell, he could sell a bag of dildos to a nun – no joke”

Funny Quotes Humorous Quotes Selling Success Quotes Gift Of Words Dildo Quotes

Book:Steel Dogs

Source: Steel Dogs

“Are you beating the meat? Flogging the bishop? Spanking the monkey?”

Humour Funny Quotes Masturbation Shock And Awe Rude Quote

Author:Matthew Bracey